Hello folks – just joined. I suspect my experience and sexual trajectory are not unusual. I’m male, in my 50s, and for as long as I can remember I’ve never not had thoughts about having sex with another guy. Along the way I have been – and still am – happily married with children. But the internet, with its smorgasbord of images and opportunities, has reopened ideas and opportunities and I’m keen to know what others have experienced. As things stand, I have had only one man-on-man experience and that was a long time ago. In recent years, though, I’ve looked at a lot of online gay porn and have chatted with a few guys on hook-up sites. There’s no doubt I’m powerfully drawn to having sex with another man again. I’m still attracted to women – my wife and anyone pretty who catches my eye on the street (although I would never be unfaithful with another woman). However, the nether regions I think about now are all male – basically cocks rather than pussies, to put it bluntly. I know I’m not alone in this, but I’m nervous about taking things further so I’m interested to know what the experiences of others have been. I have the option of taking a couple of contacts further. There’s no question that I still find women attractive and domestic life harmonious, but this is eating away at me. I’m sure other have been through this before. How was it for you....? Thanks, A
For me it's been more about internally acknowledging who I am, the sex thing is way Down the list. Being comfortable in myself.
I'm 47 years old and came out of the closet this past June. For me, it was definitely about sex. I came out to myself two years ago, but finally reached a point this June when I needed to come out of the closet for my own health. I am married with two kids. My situation is different than yours, Scotsman, because I am not attracted to women at all, and was unable to be sexual with my wife for the last 6 years or so. In order to be the real me, and finally be the gay man that I was supposed to be decades ago, I had to come out and end my marriage to my wife. Like you, I never cheated on my wife, but I had had some sexual experiences with men before my marriage, so I did know what I was missing. If you would like to know more about my story, go here: http://emptyclosets.com/forum/lgbt-later-life/219546-coming-out-47-a.html I would be happy to share anything else you would like to know. I've been pretty open about my story here at EC, so I'm not shy. Ask away! Take care. ride:
Thanks Imgay47. Really appreciate your response. Not sure we're quite in the same boat, but I see parallels. Love and good luck with the rest of the trip
Hey Scotsman My story is a little different. I am bisexual and married 32 years and never cheated. I finally came out to my wife about 6 months ago. It has been a great experience for me. My wife completely accepts my sexuality. I needed to explore the gay parts of my sexuality. So, I started making gay friends, joining gay groups and attending pride events. My wife shares in some of that. My wife and I also decided I should have some intimacy with other guys. I keep this pretty limited right now to avoid exposure to STD's. So, I am intimate with guys that I get to know as friends first even though I meet them originally on the apps. We just don't do anything until we get to know each other. A couple of the guys have become friends and they socialize with my straight friends and my wife. I highly recommend expressing your full sexuality. This doesn't need to involve sex to be fulfilling. One of my hookups I am no longer intimate with but we meet for a beer or with his friends and I have an occasional night on the town as a gay man. I don't find that it threatens my relationship with my wife at all...actually the opposite. I hope you find your fit. It can be very rewarding.
