1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.

Holiday trouble with partner

Discussion in 'LGBT Later in Life' started by bluecoat123, Dec 6, 2016.

  1. bluecoat123

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Dec 6, 2016
    Messages:
    4
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    New York
    Gender:
    Female
    Sexual Orientation:
    Lesbian
    Hello,

    I'm in my early thirties and only came out a few years ago. I am currently in my first lesbian relationship. We've been together for just about two years. My family took the news really well! They accepted my girlfriend and we often go out together for dinner and enjoy spending time.

    It's not been so easy on the other side. I've yet to meet her family -- two years into our relationship. She has been very afraid to introduce me because she says that her mother will not only give us trouble about her sexuality, which she says she is open about, but also my faith (I am Jewish, she is Catholic). She wants me to come to her family Christmas this year, but her mother will be there. This seems like a bad idea to me. She lives with her mother (she is in her late 20s and lives there for financial reasons).

    I'm worried that bringing me to Christmas could cause an issue at home as her mother has indicated she wants nothing to do with me.

    But my girlfriend says that it's time she stood up for us and that she wants spends the holidays with me. I kind of feel confused about what to do.
     
  2. BrookeVL

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Apr 30, 2016
    Messages:
    2,157
    Likes Received:
    293
    Location:
    Pennsylvania
    Gender:
    Female (trans*)
    Gender Pronoun:
    She
    Sexual Orientation:
    Lesbian
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    I think it's a very good sign that she feels that way. If she's willing to put your relationship ahead of her mother's feelings, that shows that you mean a lot to her.
     
  3. bluecoat123

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Dec 6, 2016
    Messages:
    4
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    New York
    Gender:
    Female
    Sexual Orientation:
    Lesbian
    Thank you, Brooke! This means a lot. I can never tell, I just feel so in the situation. I have felt hurt that she hasn't introduced me in the past, but I have to also look past that.
     
  4. BrookeVL

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Apr 30, 2016
    Messages:
    2,157
    Likes Received:
    293
    Location:
    Pennsylvania
    Gender:
    Female (trans*)
    Gender Pronoun:
    She
    Sexual Orientation:
    Lesbian
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    You're welcome hun, I'm always happy to help. I know what it's like to be so in a situation you don't know what's truly going on. Sometimes you need someone on the outside to say it before you realize. :slight_smile:
     
  5. bluecoat123

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Dec 6, 2016
    Messages:
    4
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    New York
    Gender:
    Female
    Sexual Orientation:
    Lesbian
    Thank you so much :slight_smile:
     
  6. looking for me

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Apr 11, 2014
    Messages:
    3,791
    Likes Received:
    869
    Location:
    on the Rock, Newfoundland and Labrador
    Gender:
    Female (trans*)
    Gender Pronoun:
    She
    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    I will say it probably wont be easy but you can always step back if you need to. it does show a lot that she is ready to introduce you to her family, especially during the holidays. her extended family would probably be there so she values you enough to share you with her family and their celebrations.

    good luck and it is Hanukkah starting on 24 Dec as well, so they coincide, sort of like the stars lining up.
     
  7. bluecoat123

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Dec 6, 2016
    Messages:
    4
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    New York
    Gender:
    Female
    Sexual Orientation:
    Lesbian
    Thank you so much, Sarah! Yes, you are right, Hannukah and xmas line up this year. Thanks also for reminding me to step back...if need be...
    I know it won't be easy. But you are right to not take for granted that she is willing to bring me...she really wants me there....