So long story short I went to college, graduated, took out loans to pay for the whole thing (because my parents were not poor enough but also not rich enough to pay for college), 10 years later I'm still living at my parents house. I want to date people but I feel so financially crippled. The finances might not be so bad if I could afford my own place, but these student loans are killing me. I have another 10 years which will make me 43 before I can have some breathing room. That is if a miracle doesn't happen first. :bang: So back to dating and living at home. We do not live in a big house and I feel like the 4 of us are living on top of each other. I have my own room, but it's small I can only fit a twin bed in the room along with a dresser and a little bit of shelving. So I want to date people but since I don't have a lot of money I can't keep going out all the time. I'm a total feminist in that I don't like people paying for my meals or entertainment. If I had my own place I think I would be comfortable inviting people over, but since I live with my parents and brother, I think it would just be weird. And the gender of my date is not really the issue, I feel weird with inviting a man or a women over. :bang: I just want to start having a romantic life, but don't see how when I'm stuck at home. Anyone else in the same boat?
Hi there... you're not alone my friend. I am 37 and I moved back home after living abroad for almost 7 years. It's a strange dynamic for sure and I also can't afford my own place (rent in South Africa is off the charts). Living with family can be trying and difficult. I'd say try little by little... I don't go out a lot, so I am not spending much, and my friends get that. I am sure you could meet someone who will understand. I think most people these days are understanding when it comes to affording places to live and dating. Also, dates could be simple things...for me, a walk in the beach and an ice cream would work. Thy guy must just know which flavour ice cream I like and we're good to go, LOL. Keep them simple and cost effective and once a month, maybe some nice restaurant or event Hugs
I live near a university. There is a chronic shortage of housing. The students group up, rent a place together (house, apartment, trailer), and live together. Man some of the situations I've seen are interesting to say the least. The students make it work. There is lots of sex going on which is good - they are living unimpeded lifestyles. I think the cost of getting a 4 year university degree / taking loans out is crippling people and thus society.
What we are living through is a demonstration of the now thoroughly discredited idea that a college education is a straight path to Easy Street. This is not the case as this article that came out today shows. One of the more shocking statistics: The elites and their owners have completely failed society, no one has money: for the majority of us, purchasing power has not gone up to any significant degree in the past 30 years, and this is not confined to the USA, it is a global crisis and explains in large part the desire of those who are on the losing end of this debacle to smash the systems of government that have led us here. The worst part is that we blame ourselves for this, in the judgment of the Owners, apparently, we aren't working hard enough. Meanwhile CEOs earn up to 450 times the salary of the lowest paid workers in their companies...I doubt they work 450 times more...
The system is set up to disproportionately benefit the 1%. And if you look at the most recent election in the United States, while the voting public thought they were electing a change agent, by virtue of the cabinet being assembled, the administration being assembled is actually going to bring more of the same. And come to think of it, with the hedge fund managers, investment bankers and CEOs currently being confirmed for the administration, an argument can be made that the system will accelerate to the further benefit of the 1%. That said, in North America, if you understand the system, unlike almost any other country in the world, the ability to be financially rewarded from taking personal economic risks exist. People have the ability to succeed above and beyond basic standards. However, most do not understand the risk/reward equation (where hard work alone is not sufficient) and make decisions that puts them amongst the masses. This all leads to a system where the 1% continue to control more and more of global weather to the detriment of the 99%.
What you have said is exactly right, the part I highlighted is especially pertinent. As Nassim Taleb says constantly, only those with "skin in the game" (i.e. something to lose) deserve our respect. On this basis, I have zero respect for the Wall Street gamblers who put us all in peril, they had nothing to lose, in fact they have gained "bigly" since then: Not to mention that they offloaded their losses to the tune of 700 Billion dollars of taxpayer money...they deserve only contempt. Meanwhile large cities are becoming more and more unaffordable, wages stagnate, and people are forced to move in with their parents...
