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How to get over someone? (unrequited love)

Discussion in 'LGBT Later in Life' started by sabrinaa, Jan 20, 2017.

  1. sabrinaa

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    So I am really having a hard time getting over this girl.

    She was kind of the reason I came out. I liked her so much and she liked me. She asked me out and I HAD to tell someone so I came out to someone close to me for the first time. We went out and I don't know what happened? I asked her out again one more time after that and I thought we had a good time, but when I texted her she was VERY slow to text me and I invited her out again and she never texted back.

    I was crushed. After that I still saw her around very consistently and it was hard! Later, we became okay talking to each other again, but I still cant get over her. It's been 5 months and I still cant help but feel like I still have a chance, but if she liked me she would show it like she did before. Before it was obvious she liked me, but after we went out she does not seem to care.

    I don't see her at all anymore and I still cant get her off my mind. I dream about her all the time. IT SUCKS!!!

    I woke up this morning with a smile on my face and an warmness in me heart after I dreamed we both laid on the floor, she grabbed my hand, our fingers were intertwined. She picked up my hand and gave me the sweetest kiss and I woke up. I woke up so happy until I realized that was a dream and I NEED TO GET OVER HER!

    Is it harder to get over the first girl you fall for? Is it just because I wanted her and did not get her? Is it just because I am that type of person to get attached? What is wrong with me and how do I stop? HELP. I want to get over her, but she is FUCKING BEAUTIFUL and AMAZING I can't help but still think about her. I hate this :icon_sad:
     
  2. Creativemind

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    It really just takes time. Usually the first step is to stop contact for a while, but since you've already done this, you just need a bit of time to process. Took me about a month before I was over my last crush.
     
  3. beenthrdonetht

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    Sigh, the short answer is yes it is harder to get over the first girl you fall for. Can I tell you I (male that I am) have experienced the silent treatment ("ghosting") not dozens, not scores, but more times than that.

    My charitable interpretation is that they intend well, but they just don't know what to say. So they say nothing and hope it's all OK with you.

    I think it's fair to say everyone on EC knows how you feel and sympathizes. I know it's the most agonizingly difficult thing to do, but just plain old asking "So what was up with that? What were your feelings?" can make you feel a lot better. Almost regardless of the answer.

    Anyway, good luck and good thoughts.
     
  4. KyleD

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    I remember when I fell for a straight guy. He was in my swimming class and we were paired together. From that time on I realized that I was falling for him. I had to do everything I had to get him out of my mind. You just have to occupy yourself with other stuff and just try to let the feelings go away. The more you think that there is a chance the worse you will feel when it doesn´t turn out the way you want it. Just lower your expectations and try to think of someone else.
     
  5. claireh

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    Try and go out and meet other people to get her out of your mind and occupy yourself with things to do. It's easily said than donee I know.I am still getting over a crush I had over a woman.I didn't see her for a bit and I even tried to think of any bad thing that I've noticed in her,so I can hate her (it's ridiculous). And I thought I did ok until I saw her agan and she is amazing. But I think with you as long as you don't see her you'll get over her,slowly than you think though.And when you find someone else you'll she wasn't worth it.Good luck