Does the concept of dating scare anyone else?

i hear you sister, im 50, trans, and not much to look at as a guy, let alone as a woman. plus all the cosiderations like hiv, like sti's in general, consent, aps, bars, like sheesh.

 

Dating is another way of making yourself vulnerable.

Through your comments on how you look, your expressing a lack of confidence and low self image. I would bet that others will find you attractive and see you for the real person you are. When you put yourself out there and start to date, and when others appreciate whom you are, you may find That your confidence and self esteem is boosted. And even if some do not appreciate you, when you realize you would be fine even if some do not, that also will boast your confidence. So either way, you can find personal development by dating.

So, my suggestion is, make yourself vulnerable, put yourself out there, and go date!

 

Hey there. I'm absolutely terrified of dating. When I was younger I kinda skipped straight over the dating part.

I'm short, scrawny, have low self esteem a negative self image and depression and anxiety. I have more grey hairs than not and I am super socially awkward and shy.

I wonder if I'll ever be ready let alone brave enough to go out let alone meet someone

 

i agree, but knowing and actually getting around or through it is not as easy as said.

 

OMG, the idea of dating women feels like I'm in high school not knowing how to approach someone I like, not knowing what to say, etc. It feels daunting for sure. I don't even know where to meet other lesbians when I'm ready to do so. I've never been one to meet people in bars (just not my scene). I like to go out to bars with friends and have a good time, but meeting a completely random person at a bar always felt a little scary to me so I never did that. Don't get me started about online dating...tried it many years ago for like 5 minutes...I found it strangely depressing like going to the grocery store for people. I know that is a major way people find each other these days, so I'm not saying there's anything wrong with it, but it just depresses me for some reason. These are the things I'm thinking about these days that make me feel frustrated and sad, like how/where will I meet people like me? Someone needs to inject some hope in me.

 

I find the idea of dating to be scary and intimidating as well. My relationships before just sort of "happened", and I never did any real dating.
Now, I'm a single father of 3 that works way too much to barely scrape by, lacking confidence and self esteem, and this feeling like not wanting to open up my life to anyone else's "baggage", much less expose them to my own.

 

I appreciate what your saying. After about twenty years of marriage, I was equally skeptical. But similar to being concened about jumping into a cold swimming pool, only to find the water is actually not bad, starting to date is similar. Sometimes, you need to just jump in.

Will it be awkward? Yes! Will you make mistakes? Yes! But you can adjust and get used to it, and then once you do, you may find the proverbial "water" is quite nice.

 

I will add that compared to (faux) straight dating, dating aligned with my (true) sexual orientation (gay) is wonderful. I love meeting and dating guys. I want to check out hot guys in public. Life is wonderful once you accept yourself (and put yourself out there as OTH suggests).

 

oh i check out hot guys. i think that, for me, is that yes im overweight, bald, and 50yrs old. but im just starting out in my transition, that seems like a hugh thing to get deeper into before a guy would want me? or that's how it seems in my head.

 

It's like I wrote this! I feel EXACTLY the same. meh