This was the disheartening realization earlier: my progress the last month on this exciting little journey of acceptance and coming out is a whopping zero. Well, maybe not entirely. I did manage to attend a PFLAG meeting, where I said I currently consider myself gay. But past that...well, put it this way: I feel like a month has passed, but I'm stuck exactly where I was on April 12. Wonderful.:bang: At least I know some issues that need to be addressed. But the hard part is that to some degree, I have no control. For example, I need to build my social network. Partly because between coming out, and some other unrelated events, a percentage of what I have now will be gone. Plus I could frankly use more real world friends...maybe if I had more of a social life, I wouldn't feel so frustrated when I see all the happy little couples out and about Friday nights! But I can't really do anything but meet people, try to figure out ways of improving my lousy social skills, and hope for the best...all of which I've done the last month with zero results. Perhaps in the coming month...
Sorry you're having a rough time. Things don't always progress at an even pace. That's true in all aspects of life, I'm sure you'll agree. I actually wasn't making any conscious effort to be more "out" than I already was when I identified as bi. But I started to evaluate other changes in my life and started to ask myself a few things. I just had a sort of epiphany one day while driving to an appointment with my therapist. I was on my way to being out as gay within a few weeks. Sometimes things are like that. You think you're going nowhere, and then suddenly you look down and see that you're at 30,000 feet, destination unknown.
I agree with whrla...there probably are things going right now that you are unaware of that are preparing you for a kind of takeoff. Inner things, the psyche rearranging itself, these are the things I'm talking about. Like a rocket just sitting there on the Launchpad, not much seems to be happening...until the countdown!
How about... Do something wild and crazy? Wild an crazy in the closet is really "ho-hum" outside the closet. Next week buy yourself a mens bracelet. It can be an inexpensive leather surfer's bracelet or a more stylish metal link piece. Then force yourself to wear it everywhere. Now the bracelet means nothing but to you. To you it says "I am gay". When you are comfy with that buy yourself a men's necklace. Same deal. Baby steps. Maybe only you know but you are making baby steps. I wear a ring. It is made from a 1843 Walking Liberty half dollar. I can see the engraved rising sun and it symbolizes a new day to me. The word "LIBERTY" is emblazoned around the ring and symbolizes freedom from the past, freedom from the closet. Mobile Site Preview Now you know but nobody else does. I see It a 100 times a day and it reminds me of the good days ahead. 100 baby steps a day. There are things you can do to move forward.
