Twice in the last 36 hours, someone has asked me what's new and exciting in my life. If I'd a had a bit more to drink I would have told them. But my wife would not have been very pleased. Last night it was at a neighborhood get together. So, Bill, what's new and exciting in your life? asked a neighbor. And then he actually said, "Just give us the juicy bits." I just wanted to scream. Okay, you want to juicy bits? I'm gay. Is that juicy enough? I think that might have brought the conversation to a halt. Today it was at my mother-in-law's. Her short-term memory is so shot that she wouldn't have remembered five minutes later. And she's so deaf, I would have had to shout. "I'm gay." She'd say, "what?" And I envisioned shouting into her hearing aid. "Gay! I'm a homosexual!" "Oh, that's nice," she'd smile and then forget the whole thing.
I am with greatwhale! Ok, you being gay is so yesterday. Boring! How are you buddy? How are you really? I don 't care if it is titulating at all.
I'm great, skiff. Thanks for asking. I'm now out to almost everyone I care about. I may have mentioned in the past that I have had a certain amount of trepidation about telling one friend whose father was in the closet when we were in high school. We all knew he was in the closet and it was an enormous charade, as we pretended not to know what he didn't want us to know. But a mutual friend of ours I did come out to told me that she was talking to our friend and he talked about yet another old friend who had recently come out at 60. And then he made some comment like "We're all coming out now." So I started to write an e-mail (he's on the other side of the country), but then hesitated. I just want to do this right, in a way that won't freak him out. This could be very interesting.
I gotta say that was quite funny how you described having to yell for your mother in law to hear you. Congratulations on coming out to so many people! I hope everything is going good with all that
Funny I've been having that exact same experience (well not the deaf m-i-l...) Very tempting to tell but gotta wait till the wife's okay with telling all.
When people ask me any questions about how I'm doing, whats new etc., I still have the mask on. I'm unfortunately still at the point that I'm hiding my true self for most people I see at work, in the community, etc. I just go on with the pretending that I have this neat straight as an arrow life. But, every time I say something false now I'm hyper aware of it and feel a pang and ask myself why I can't just be who I am. I'm inspired by all you brave ones who are out to everyone. I'm hoping to get there.
Note: I only thought about saying those things. I didn't actually say them. Days like today, I wish I hadn't mentioned it to anybody. I'm having one of those days when I wonder WTF I'm doing.
I appreciate your post! There are days that I just want a parade down main street with a big fracking rainbow hot air balloon pulling drag queens and men in chaps behind it like they were fracking water skiing! And then other days I open my eyes, realize I am alone in bed, I will be alone at breakfast, lunch and dinner...and say WTF am I doing? (Que talking heads "burning down the house") How did I get here? This is not my beautiful life! Same as it ever was...watching the days go by! Hang in there. Keep posting. Writing has been very therapeutic for me, and you will not find a better group, or so my experience has been so far!
I all think we go through those up and down days, hang in there, and had to laugh about meeting the neighbor next time you meet just tell him, we would love to know the reaction.
As I have been outed in small town and bigger one too (too hard to explain) should be interesting at upcoming kid's sporting events. I don't mind . proud of who I am but wondering how people I usually chat with will react.... Can always hang out with nice lesbian couple-our sons are friends. I haven't told them yet. Silly, right?!
I don't know whether it's "silly," but I think you should definitely make contact with your son's friend's parents. They could probably be hugely helpful to you.
