Tonight is my last night in my house. Last night we are together as a family in our home. Tomorrow I will move to my new place. I've felt mostly excited all week. And even most of today. But now as I put my little boy to bed, the sadness has hit me. Life has changed so quickly. A year ago I never EVER would have believed this would be happening. I have no doubt it's the right thing, but saying goodbye to this part of my life...wow...my home, my husband, the only life my kids have ever known, the life I've known for 17 years. All we've been through....good and bad....all these walls have seen. I just want to have a good cry.
I'm with you on this one, Ohana. It's a radical change, and there's no other way to go about it...I wish upon you strength, fortitude and courage in the days ahead. Nothing ever happens without these things.
Ohana, may I ask why 'you' left the home, rather than your spouse? I can imagine how difficult this must be for you. I want to separate from my husband, but just don't have the financial stability at this time. Each day living here, living a lie is killing me! I just wanted to wish you luck in your new place and luck in your future. Glad to be reminded by all the people here on EC that I'm not alone. Take care.
Take care, Ohana-- As excited as you are for your future, make sure you take the time to grieve. Even though you're moving on to a more authentic life, you may need to grieve what is no longer--your marriage, your nuclear family. It was your life for a very long time, and was filled with certain promises and hopes. Make sure, if you haven't already, give yourself time to grieve that. Also, I'm in a particularly tough place myself tonight--my husband said he was filing for divorce on Monday and has totally shut me out emotionally. As tough as it is, when I catch myself mourning what I'm losing, I also remember what I'm gaining. That may help, too. Be sure to take care of yourself. --Zoe
Such care around you Ohana. Zoe's words and Great whale are real wisdom. Grieving is there for you now as the thrill of freedom and bittersweet moments with your children, now. I hope that the future verymuch contains your contributions to your children. The challenge of two homes really need to have co-parents that work together as much as they can. My daughters mother left me for another man. She stayed in the house for two months so that sghe could find a safe place to transition. Tough time but through my time of grieving and growing, i beleive that i was ultimately healthier, which makes me a better parent good luck to you and also to Zoe.
Oh ohana, You have strength, honesty, and integrity to take this step. Just reading your post brings tears to my eyes. I was looking at apartments this past weekend but theres no time frame. Also, my kids are older; my daughter is mostly away; my son will be next year. Life goes on. Transitions. Have the cry. As we say in Italian, CORAGGIO!
