My brother told me he thinks hes gay. Of course, I love him all the same, but his answers really surprised me. He only a preteen (I’m not going to say his real age), so hes old enough to understand. When I asked him why he thinks hes gay (my first thoughts were hes being bullied into thinking it, as he has some ’feminine’ traits), and he said i dont know. I asked him if anybody told him he was gay, same answer. He seemed pretty serious, so I dought anybody told him he was. Then I asked him if he liked boys, and he said no. I dont know if he was lying, or if he just thinks being gay means something different or whatever, but Im worried he doesnt understand. Also, I am terrified of how my parents, specifically my dad and his family, would react (if my brother really was gay) to their only two children being gay.
You should ask him about it. Ask him what he thinks it means. I think a lot of people misuse it, and because he said he doesn't like boys, I'm betting he's a bit confused about what it means. There's no harm in talking to him about it, right?
I second the talking to him. Maybe giving him really good solid information and letting him com to the conclusion himself. Being supportive is the best way to go. The thing with the "I don't know" as an answer might be that he does in fact know but is scared to say it because he is gauging your reaction. I typically knew my answer when I said "I don't know", but either was too scared to answer, or simply didn't want to admit it.. Be supportive.. Be an open ear.. Odds are, he'll have more questions for you over time. Just educate yourself so you can help answer them.
I think it's possible he lied when he said he didn't like men, he might've said he though he was gay and then got scared and denied everything else. This is only an idea, never make any assumptions.
You reminded me of this video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Kt0YfokmcYY I follow her on YouTube. She's a lesbian and apparently her brother is gay also. So I guess it's not as uncommon as you think. Also there's another person I follow on YouTube who's a lesbian and her brother recently came out as gay, but they seem to be the only two out of 7 children. As for advice on coming out to your father, maybe try easing him into it. Tell him why he shouldn't be opposed to homosexuality before you and your brother come out. Also I would talk to your brother (tell him you're gay as well). Maybe you too could come out together or maybe you should come out first. I think you need to talk with both your father and your brother about this.
My sister is gay and out to everyone and I am bisexual/queer and out to my sister. So yeah, it happens.
Definitely talk to him about what gay means, stuff like that. Also remind him that there's nothing wrong with liking the same sex because he might just be worried that you'll hate him. My mum used to work at a youth wing and her boss, Dawn, was a lesbian, and Dawn's brother was gay! Apparently my mum once asked her how their parents felt about their only kids both being gay and Dawn just said "we don't really talk about it" I once saw Dawn and her daughter at gay pride. I tried to say hi but she didn't notice, or ignored me she's pregnant again, with another girl
He very well could be gay. I'm gay and my younger brother came out last year that he is gay too. It just happens.
