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How do mom's "always know"

Discussion in 'For Parents and Family Members of LGBT People' started by Lightning13, Feb 16, 2015.

  1. Lightning13

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    My whole life I've lived separately from my birth mom however I had visited her regularly on the weekends up until I was about 16 then it became less frequent. Anyways since the age of 15 she had always started to randomly bring up and remind me if I was gay she would love me regardless (she still does to this day and i'm 20) which surprises and confuses me because I've always been very straight acting and my friends are the same and she had even caught me with a girl before and at that point I had never told anyone I was Bi or even did or said anything to the same sex to cause rumors so i'm curious how?
     
  2. QueerTransEnby

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    They don't. LOL. My mom was definitely surprised when I came out.
     
  3. blueberrykisses

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    I don't think they ALWAYS know, in fact sometimes it seems like they really don't know even when it's obvious..

    Anyways that's weird that your mom constantly brings that up! You should just come out to her if she's so accepting anyway! And ask her. xo
     
  4. hat123

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    Nah they don't. I thought that my mom already knew, but turned out that she has no idea ! Or at least she has some ideas about it, but denying the idea and store it in the "absurd thought" categories in the brain.(!)(!)
     
  5. jane anon

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    They don't always know. I always thought that my grandma (like my mom) suspected something was a bit queer about me, but when I came out to her, she was pretty surprised.
     
  6. sldanlm

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    Mine didn't know.
     
  7. tulipinacup

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    I guess it depends. But basing from my own mum, she's pretty fucking good with her intuition, lol. While I know she already knows I'm gay,she hasn't really said anything about it since she's pretty impartial when it comes to LGBT issues since she's christian and all.
     
  8. Lightning13

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    @blueberrykisses I'm actually doing so when I see them in person next (2 weeks) and I don't know it just dumbfounds me no one except 1 best friend and her has had any hunch about me
     
  9. Jellal

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    My mom told me she thought I might be gay, but she definitely didn't have a clue about my gender issues.
     
  10. Lightning13

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    Yeah I mean my mom isn't perfect in her prediction ether she thinks i'm gay even though to her it should be quite obvious i'm Bi after walking in on me and a girl when I was 16
     
  11. gravechild

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    They don't always, but I'd suspect when you spend so many years around someone, privy to their private life and secrets, it would be a little easier to "figure out". Supposedly, gay males stand out a bit more, due to the media, and women are taught to put more stock into body language and whatnot, so that could play a part, too.

    My own mother said something similar, which I thought was an indicator that she "knew", but it turns out, she was just voicing her acceptance, especially since you hear more about it in the news. She was surprised, went through denial, sadness, bargaining, etc.
     
  12. Michael

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    Naw, it depends on the person. There is always people (male or female) that always know, as in being intuitive (a.k.a. they observe and analize, they might be aware of this process or they might not, that doesn't change the nature of the process).

    Now most mothers tend to look closely at their offspring. If the offspring is good at lying/ hidding, they might not notice anyways. If the kids are not good at lying/hidding, they will notice... Easily.

    You should also take in consideration, mothers are way older than you. Older people can read at younger people like open books.
     
  13. Lightning13

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    That makes sense because I look at my little brothers and sisters and can read them like a book . I hope my mom isn't to surprised when I tell here and go through those stages but also it brings my biggest fear telling her she's very religious yet loving and can accept the nature that you are born with your sexuality but I fear since I'm not gay and im bi she can now throw the "your choosing to be like this argument" at me and I don't know how to respond in a way that's non refutable if that happens
     
  14. Chiroptera

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    Mine had absolutely no fucking idea.
     
  15. ForNarnia

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    Mine's the same, I swear to God she knows, but I have no idea how :/
     
  16. YuriBunny

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    Both my parents suspected for a long time, but when I asked them how they knew, they just laughed and wouldn't tell me. O.O
     
  17. jay777

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    You could have a look here:
    http://emptyclosets.com/forum/coming-out-advice/167499-coming-out-family.html#2

    hugs
     
  18. I'm_Danni_x

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    Nah mum's don't always know unless you're stereotypicaly LGBT. My mum never had the faintest idea I like women it wasn't until I told her that she knew.
     
  19. resu

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    My mom didn't even though I had never expressed interest in girls and was always single. After coming out, I realized she had this idea I would get married and have grandchildren for her to care over. :/
     
  20. Rouqe

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    Some mums are installed with Gaydar... Simple.

    If you look closely at their foreheads in the light of a full moon reflected through a precision cut prism you can see the vague outlines of a small circular disc which is the physical portion of the Gaydar.

    Unfortunately warranty is voided if this above procedure is acted on and may be accompanied by exclamations of "What the hell are you doing?".