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UPDATE: I think my little brother might be gay

Discussion in 'For Parents and Family Members of LGBT People' started by Recession09, Feb 22, 2015.

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  1. Recession09

    Recession09 Guest

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    I don't know if you remember me, but I first came on here a while ago and I posted a thread about me finding gay porn in my little brother's Chrome history...well as it turns out, I was right, he is gay. I went with him to see The Imitation Game, as I said I would, and then we went to a cafe and started talking about gay rights and what have you. He got visibly uncomfortable and I guess he sort of sensed I was onto something, and I couldn't hold it anymore and I just flat out told him, which maybe in hindsight wasn't the best idea ever. He stood there frozen for like 5 seconds, then admitted. I then apologised for all the instances I was casually homophobic and told him I didn't mean any of it and that I would try to change. He started crying so I took him to my flat where I gave him a beer and a few tissues (he's 16 but the situation called for it). I had my girlfriend over so we both tried to comfort him and tell him everything will be alright. We discussed our plan regarding our parents and he agreed that he wouldn't tell them anything until he's finally of age and on his own, and we assured him that he would always have a place to stay should things go downhill.

    I feel like the weight of the world has been lifted off my shoulders. I am finally a free man again, and it went better than expected. I also feel like I've bonded with my brother in a way I never did before. So yeah, happy days I guess. Cue the cheesy pop music, I don't even give a flying f*ck anymore, haha.
     
    #1 Recession09, Feb 22, 2015
  2. Peacemaker

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    thats great that you were there for your brother
     
    #2 Peacemaker, Feb 22, 2015
  3. Chiroptera

    Chiroptera
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    Hey, i remember you.

    Glad that everything went well.

    Have you considered showing him this site?
     
    #3 Chiroptera, Feb 22, 2015
  4. Recession09

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    Well it turns out he's a constant lurker. Maybe he'll make an account, I don't know. He's still in my flat but he's watching football on the telly with my girlfriend, and he doesn't know anything about my posts here...how or why that is beats me, given that he told me he checks this forum everyday.
     
    #4 Recession09, Feb 22, 2015
  5. Filip

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    Of course I remember you!

    And I'm glad to hear it went as well as it could go. Yeah, suddenly confronting him with it might not have been the most subtle move. I'm normally more a fan of the careful method myself. But seems that in this case the head-on method was the way to go :wink:

    And it's totally normal to feel closer now. In fact, you are! Being out of the closet makes it a lot easier to get along with people. Now he knows you really are there for him no matter what.

    In any case: tell him we won't bite if he decides to make an account :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes:
     
    #5 Filip, Feb 22, 2015
  6. Recession09

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    Hey mate, cut me some slack, I was more nervous now than I was before my...first time, and I planned that 2 weeks beforehand :lol: I'm simply glad it all went so well, despite my utter incompetence at being the reserved, emotionless, shoulder-to-cry-on big brother. And I guess he never made an account here because he never really, truly embraced the reality of his orientation, we're the first people he's ever told. I guess with time he'll become more and more comfortable and be ready to interact with other people who've had similar experiences.
     
    #6 Recession09, Feb 22, 2015
  7. KingJude

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    Well done! You're a great brother for accepting him. :slight_smile:
     
    #7 KingJude, Feb 22, 2015
  8. Hiems

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    Jeez, I wish my older brothers would be as accepting as you are. He's quite lucky to have you! Thanks for being such an open-minded person. We need more allies like you around :grin:
     
    #8 Hiems, Feb 22, 2015
  9. Chip

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    You are the most amazing, loving, supportive older brother someone could have. I'm sure he was terrified... but I'm also certain that having someone who knows his secret, who he knows is in his corner... is an immeasurable gift to him. I'm sure it took a lot for you to be able to talk to him about this... and he must have been right on the verge of ready, or he would not have admitted it and talked to you about it.

    The gift you've given him can't be measured. I know he appreciates it more than you could know.
     
    #9 Chip, Feb 22, 2015
  10. Recession09

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    Heh, thanks :icon_bigg I'm just grateful I didn't let my religious, racist parents influence my thoughts or opinions.
     
    #10 Recession09, Feb 22, 2015
  11. pinkpanther

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    Happy endings are always the best. Cheers! :slight_smile:
     
    #11 pinkpanther, Feb 22, 2015
  12. aboutface

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    I'll just reiterate what a great brother you are being. I'm so happy for him that he has someone like you for support.
     
    #12 aboutface, Feb 22, 2015
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