Therapy didn't go well today

J is in tears over today's therapy, so much so that I had the urge to drive out there and go see this therapist. J feels like this is one big test. The therapist asks questions and J feels incompetent with every answer.

J lives with a man. They were once engaged to be married before J decided to transition. T is fine with it and they've worked it out and are best friends who share an apt. The therapist starts asking what will happen with the transition if something happens to T. Of course J got upset. J was told to think about it and answer next week.

J was asked why surgery and hrt and J talked about being misgendered by strangers and apparently the shrink doesn't think this is a good enough reason. I was like.... was this shrink even in the same room with you? I mean.. did she notice that you look like a girl, not a boy? ::shaking head:: I'm the mother, I changed the diapers so, yes, I make the mistake of misgendering even though I am really working on it, but the shrink is using the wrong name and gender referring to J to other staff as MISS.

J was crying so hard that I thought that I need to beat this woman's ass! J isn't being sent to therapy to hear negativity! I calmly reminded J that I've got a guy lined up if J feels uncomfortable with this woman because not every shrink is a good fit. J said no because there are only 5 weeks left to get the letter IF the woman will write it. :eek: IF. I asked if I should come and deal with this woman and J laughed and said it was under control.

Is this a normal part of the process? J works outdoors in the heat and this day off was spent in despair. :icon_sad:

 

Yanno Becky, now I feel like I did this. I told J before the first appointment not to worry because therapy would prove to be cathartic. I told J that therapy was like taking an emotional poop and now I think it's causing more anxiety. J asked what to wear to the appointment and I said just be neat and clean and wear whatever is comfortable. They are not there to judge you and the ONLY power a shrink has is what YOU give them.

How long have you been going? I never felt anxious about therapy, but then again I know that if I don't like someone's attitude, I'd have no problem offering a verbal adjustment. ... physical if warranted and I have no problem throwing down with someone who messes with my kid. The thing is that I will not be here forever, and J has to learn to throw down when warranted. The only person J is getting forceful with is me .... and I'm the one that's ALWAYS on J's side, right or wrong.