I want to celebrate my wife

What do you feel about your wife's new orientation? Are you feeling OK? In my view there is no need to "celebrate" it unless you really feel like it.

 

Some of the most meaningful ways my husband has supported me through this:

- frequent check-ins to ask how I'm doing
- open sharing of his feelings, worries, thoughts
- giving me space to process; making me take time away by myself
- helping me see these desires are beautiful and not wrong
- asking me what I find attractive about women (even being willing to share f/f kissing gifs and artwork he enjoys)
- we take a lot of walks holding hands, and go on a lot of dates
- learning on his own about bisexuality and LGBT identity
- honoring my need for a safe space to explore; he knows about my support systems, but doesn't lurk or pry
- encouraging me to think about (and act on) what I need without any need to be a part of it (i.e.; he hasn't asked for and doesn't expect a threesome)
- calmly discusses boundaries (what he can live with, what he needs in return)

He's a keeper, obviously... I know this is a journey and a challenge for both of us. It's also important he's accessing supports.

 

Hey PH,

This site has some good resources: Straight Spouse Network |.

I don't know your wife... but I know that for me, a grand gesture might feel uncomfortable. That being said, I truly do appreciate that my husband arranged for me to have some time away. I'll probably spend a lot of time crying because I can, but I also plan to simply *be* --- to spend four whole days without worrying about other people around me and how the changes in me affect them.

 

Life is ever changing and presents all of us with many challenges. I feel incredibly grateful for the relationship with my husband b/c he is always there to support me, offer a shoulder and/or ear, and offers me calming, sage advise. He makes me a better person.

If you and your wife have a similar depth to your relationship then I would suggest simply reflecting on when your wife has been there for you during trying times, allow yourself to feel that love and then find a time to thank her for her support and what it meant to you. In this way you are indirectly celebrating her for being fantastic and also directly celebrating the love the two of you have for each other.