Hi, my son is 6 now.. I come from a very religious family so my kids don't even know the meaning of the word gay and have never heard it spoken. When my son was 5 he was wearing my daughters dress and his grandma told him boys don't wear dresses.. his response was that he's half boy and half girl so he can wear dresses. He loves Barbie, and pink things, he loves doing his hair and quite literally spends hours doing it. I keep catching him wearing my make up... I have some parents that say it's just a phase and others that say he's definitely gay. Honestly I could care less either way I love my son and will always support him.
Hey cluel, Welcome to EC! And thanks for seeking out advice here as a concerned and loving parent. First, only your son will be able to determine his own sexual orientation and only he can decide if or when to tell you. Of course, he will need to figure that out for himself first and you can only be supportive of him because that is a journey that he has to make alone. It is possible that he is gay. It is possible that he is transsexual. It is also possible that this type of activity will change as he grows into an understanding of himself. Only time will tell. Basically, all I would advise at this point is that you continue to be supportive of him and continue to give him your unconditional love. Take Care.
He could be gay, transgender, transvestite or, just a kid that loves, admires and, wants to mimic his Mum. Be supportive, don't discourage him or overly encourage him, just let him be himself. He will come to knowing what he is and, with a supportive Mum, it won't be a big deal for him to tell you, when he decides.
before puberty, that didn't happen for me until the summer I was 15 , prob new I was different somewhere between 8 and 10. THANK YOU for being kind and supportive to your son, it will all the difference to him as he grows into a man. take care dean
You're such an awesome parent. Welcome to EC! Like above, continue to love him for who he is. If he wants to play with Barbie then that's okay! Wearing dresses? Cool I loved wearing dresses and cop outfits when I was little. It's not going to answer all your questions but it's a little too early to give a concrete answer. But keep up the love and support and no teach your child to love themselves.
He'll know.. when he finds out, and finds the words, he'll be able to let you know.. He maybe genderqueer or transgender, he may be straight, bi, or gay its all totally cool and I am so happy for him and for you that you are there for him and support him That what he needs. Just love, support, and the freedom and opportunity to be himself. It really doesn't matter if he is gay or straight, or whatever... the labels are unimportant at the end of the day. Just as long as he gets to be himself and is supported Very happy for you that you are such a good parent to him! Best wishes!!!
My son is 8 now, but has consistently said he is half girl and half boy since he was about 4. This past summer, he told me what that means is he is a boy now, but will be a girl when he grows up. He has gone through times when he wore nail polish, has owned girls sandals, He has been growing his hair for two years now. In pre-school, he had a crush on a boy in his class. And tells me sometimes he enjoys when strangers refer to him as a girl. Other times he prefers to be seen as a boy. In kindergarten, a boy told him that boys can't wear nail polish. My son responded, Well this boy does. I just make sure to tell him no matter what he feels like, I want him to know he is loved. My feeling as been as long as he is confident enough to make it work, I let him.
First of all, actions don't define sexuality. So, just wait because only time will tell if your son is gay, straight, transgender, or just enjoys crisscrossing. In the end, it is up to him and him only as odds are he knows himself and his feelings the best. So, I'd just advise you to wait things out and be patient before you jump to conclusions.
Glad you support and love your son no matter what. I live the family nightmare of haters. Not my parents but some family members. Not sure if your question on When You Know means for you or your son. I will say I knew my attractions about 4 or 5 that boys and girls were cute equally. Relationships and sexuality have been about 50/50.
I think it really depends on the individual. I grew up in a religious family and very sheltered, and so I didn't consider being gay until ~7th grade.
I agree that time will tell. Kids are kids, and they're learning and exploring the world around them. Most kids that I've known are just as happy to pick up and play with any toy, regardless of what gender that toy is for. They don't start to be discerning unless they're scolded, or told what is or isn't "appropriate", or when they find which things they like best. Keep in mind that pink and dresses and makeup are only girl things because we've labelled them as such - and there have been many instances throughout history and across cultures where pink, dresses, and makeup were for boys, believe it or not!
Loving barbie and pink things and makeup doesn't mean he is gay. His sexuality doesn't matter right now though, he's just a kid! It's not like he's going to be getting into relationships anytime soon. If he really is gay though, then he'll probably figure that out when he's older and then he'll probably tell you.
I think as long as you support your son you will be 100% ok! You sound like a very loving parent, and you are the right path to doing what needs to be done. To be honest you can never truly know until your child tells you what they are. I wore dresses as a child and let my cousins do my make-up, and I am gay. Yet, my best childhood friend did the same thing, and he is inexplicably straight. I think let the wave ride. He could just be playing with things he likes, and that is fine. He could be a number of things, but you will never truly know until he explicitly states it. I think as long as you keep your love and support as readily available as it is now everything will be just fine!
