Found out my brother is gay!

I'd say let him come to you when he's ready. I know I wouldn't particularly like my sister doing that to me.

 

aww what a nice sister.

this one's a hard call. it might freak him out at first for you to know so i wouldnt just directly call him out on it, but maybe kinda keep bringing up your thoughts on gays, like how you don't believe it's a choice and how there's nothing wrong with it, and stuff like that.

personally i think it would have been much easier for me if my sister had figured out i was gay and we could have talked about it. at risk of sounding cliche, he's got a long, tough journey ahead of him, and you being there will be a great help.

 

I think you should let him know your fine with gay people and let him know it's ok if he is gay. I wouldnt like it if my sister pretended to be a lesbian so I would tell her I'm one, I would feel like she tricked me into coming out to her. He will come out in his own time just be suportive he may still be questioning himself.

 

Maybe he was leaving a clue for you? heh
I know it would be easier for me if I was asked about it instead of having to tell. Just make sure he knows that you are totally OK with gay people.

 

Hi and welcome to EC
It's great that you're fine with the idea your brother could be gay. He'll probably need all the support he could have when he will come out.
Now, I think it's up to hime to come out to you when he'll feel ready and maybe asking him directly questions about his sexuality is not the best option, but you can help him feeling at ease with you by slipping sometimes (and when it's appropriate) in the conversation that you're ok with gay people. And be patient.
Take care, Eleanor

 

First off, I want to say how great it is that there are sisters like you out there!
Second, like everyone else has said, just slip something in about how you don't mind at all, don't make it obvious or anything, just go with the flow... Just let him know that you are there for him without being overly open about it.

 

For the love of GOD, dont do that!!

 

Inventive, but no, don't do that. Also on the list of things not to do would be cornering your brother before he may be ready to come out to anyone, including himself. An exception could be made if he were self-harming or similarly dangerous behavior was exhibited.

If your brother is indeed gay, or some other letter of the rainbow alphabet soup and is considering coming out to you, he may think through everything you have said to sift through for some hint of how you may take the news. You can make this easier by mentioning every so often that he can confide and ask for your help on any issue. Demonstrating some knowledge of issues facing gay individuals would be helpful. Gay jokes can be pretty funny making a little mention afterwards that indicates you know the difference between joke and reality, or that you are sympathetic to the cause will help. Whatever you choose to say, while others may not be on high alert looking for clues that you are a safe person to come out to, the opposite can be said of just about any queer individual.

You can bring a horse to water but you cannot make it drink. Likewise you can create an atmosphere supportive of your brother, but ultimately he is the one who must discover and accept himself.

 

I agree with all the others, just let it slip that you have no problems with gay people, and then just let him know that he is very special to you, and that you love him no matter what. After that, just let him come to you whenever he feels like it as Nitro said "You can bring a horse to water but you cannot make it drink".

 

i think that you should you should hint around but not obvious stuff showing your ok with gay guys thats best you can do for now for him

 

I would have loved it if my sister did that to try and squeeze the gay out of me!

But yea, find out if the likes them first cause not all gays love that stuff (Me personally? I love it soooo much, but thats not everyone) If he does like one of them and you took him to a concert i think that would be an amazing thing to do.

Also yea, like alot of other people are saying, dont just sit back and wait for him to come to you but also dont jump him with the "are you gaaaaaaay?!?!" question. Not-so-subtle hints that you accept it are the best way to go in my opinion

Once he does come out to you, Share this site with him! Im sure he could use the support.

 

I have a thought.
maybe just randomly hug him, and while you are, say something to the effect of "I know, and I'm ok with it".
idk. just seems like a nicer way to tell him

 

As other people have already mentioned, I wouldn't recommend pretending to be even a little lesbian yourself, it could really confuse him and make him think that if you can "become straight" again, he could too. My sister knew I was gay before even I'd figured it out, and she dropped a lot of hints, mentioned how a friend of hers was gay and basically just let me know she was accepting of homosexuality, which made me a lot more comfortable coming out to her.

 

Just make him know that you're 100% cool with gay people and let him come out when he's ready. It's great that he has a such a supportive sister!

 

A "little Lesbian"? That doesn't sound good. Whatever you do, just make sure you don't lie to him. Even if it is for his own good. I can't abide by lying whatsoever.

But I feel I should warn you not to 'out' him. And by that I mean 'exposing', as if there were something actually wrong with him, as gay to other people. It's usually very traumatizing and can have lasting detrimental effects on his self esteem and mental health.

Just be there for him. Like other's have said, drop subtle hints. Say the occasional thing, since he's not out yet be sure to be alone with him, "Being gay isn't so bad."
Or "Being gay isn't so weird." You don't have to full on say "Being gay is perfectly normal, okay!" or "It's okay that you're gay!" Just subtly is what'll get him to come out.

More oft than not, it's an acceptence of self that is needed before coming out. This is partly due to society telling us that being gay is not cool or okay and that it is highly unusual which is highly untrue. It's very natural, not uncommon, and has existed all throughout history. Some people may have you believe otherwise though. A prime example? Alexander the Great. It's the only one I can think of off the top of my head but there are others.

 

i like seans idea just hug his say you know that you love him and that when hes ready he can talk to you

 

No matter what you do, you can do no harm. I mean you reached out o a gay support site to help your brother. You'll do the right thing. Your already the sister most of us would want so just continue being the sis your brother needs if he indeed gay.