Hey guys, This is more just to vent than to seek advice, but anybody with helpful input is welcome to reply. So today I have finally been forced to accept the fact that I have had tellogen effluvium for a while. I kept hoping it would just go away, but it's just getting worse and worse and it looks horrible. My doctor assures me it's stress induced but even the most basic google search casts doubts over whether stress is actually connected to hair loss. What I hate the most is that I can easily cover up depression/anxiety if I need to, whereas this is just there on display for the whole world to see. It's probably what's at the root of my dysmorphia, and it's preventing me from making the effort to meet anybody new, which is something I badly need in my life right now. Basically this condition is just killing my remaining confidence, and I'm really questioning every day whether it's ever going to improve. It doesn't for everybody, right? And if this doesn't get better, how am I supposed to get over my dysmorphia? Agh I hate this so much. Thanks for patiently reading. (&&&)
Hmm. Do you have the sort of head that would look good shaved? At least here in the US, that's a rather popular men's hairstyle. Just an initial thought, Todd
I don't think I would suit a shaved head at all unfortunately, and it is something I've seriously thought about. It's also not quite so common in England - not on white men at least - so I would probably stand out more than desired. Maybe that's better than standing out the way I do now though, I'll have a think about it. Thank you for replying.
(*hug*) That really sucks... I had to google it because I had never heard the term tellogen effluvium before I did see some references to "stress induced" so maybe there is some research you can do on that side of things to (a) see if it is true (b) do something to reduce your stress levels ? And wearing your hair shorter (rather than shaved) might be a something you can do in the meantime??
How about wearing hats? Fedoras, trilbies, bowler hats, pork pies, cowboy hats, flat caps, berets, top hats, etc. Hats are very much in fashion these days. Once you wear a hat often enough, people will get used to you wearing hats and won't even think about why you're wearing them. Have a thorough collection so you have one to go with every outfit. See which kind of hat works best with your personal style. :king:
Thank you (*hug*) Yes it does suck, my self esteem was low enough already but now I just get paranoid that everybody's staring at me. I first noticed it over a year ago but it seemed stable so I learned to live with it, but it's gotten so much worse recently that I just can't cope. I know there are worse problems to have but my issue with this is that it's on display to the rest of the world and it's easily one of the most noticeable things about me right now. My doctor, who supposedly has some experience, in dermatology, assures me that it's stress induced, especially given my less than stable mental condition, but the research that I've done into whether emotional stress can cause hair loss seems to draw a lot of blanks. Either way, it's been ongoing for a while, and I can't think of a persistent stress trigger that would be causing it. I'll carry on working on it though. Getting a shorter haircut and seeing how I like it might not be such a bad idea, I might try that in a couple of weeks. Believe me, wearing a baseball cap is the only way I can force myself to step outside right now. It is fine as a short term solution, but I don't want to have to hide behind a hat for the rest of my life. Especially when I won't always be able to wear one - case in point, when I'm engaged in certain *ahem* physical activities with a hypothetical boyfriend, I won't be able to wear a hat, and I don't want him to be turned off by looking at me, and I don't want to be distracted by worrying about whether he's turned off by looking at me. I think my best option would to be to start minoxidil treatment, but it's so expensive I don't know what to do.
Another hug from me (*hug*) Have you asked if you can get Menoxidil on prescription. I know people pay for it over the counter but that doesn't mean you can't get it prescribed on NHS? Got to be worth a try? The other thing is to try and go against the grain and just rise above it like it doesn't matter. I know really it is hurting but you can trick yourself in to just "facing it up" as they say.. "I'm bigger than a bit of temporary hair loss". I see people on the tube every day who have a birth mark across their face, or a scar or some other trait and there they are... not really inviting ridicule at all. Worth a thought.
Thank you for the hug. (*hug*) I believe Minoxidil can only be prescribed privately, which is about as expensive than buying it over the counter, but I will certainly ask my doctor next time I'm there. She didn't seem to be that interested in the issue last time I saw her since she thinks my mental health problems are the priority, but it's my opinion that I'll find it easier to recover from mental health issues when I'm not constantly stressing about losing my hair... I'm also really bad at rising up to things. It's all very well to assure myself that I don't care what other people think, but I really do, and this situation is making my self esteem low enough that I'm terrified to put myself out there and meet new people. I first noticed a bit of hair loss a year and a couple of months ago, and until recently I have been trying my best to ignore it and rise above it - but over the last few months it's gotten much worse, not only to my eyes but also I'm sure to the eyes of others who have made a couple of comments about it (nothing rude, but the mere fact that it's that noticeable is hugely triggering for me). My hair can fall out when I'm fifty and in a committed relationship all it likes, but when I'm only twenty and have never had a boyfriend it's just quite a depressing predicament to be in.
