Right I've been topping my bf for a few weeks now and we were both virgins before hand. When I was with girls I could make them cum so easily (partly because I never enjoyed sex so a lot of the focus was on them) and I really want to make him cum. The main problem is that I cum too early, I can tell by his breathing he's really enjoying himself but just not for long enough. We don't use condoms (both lost our virginity to eachother so no STDs) but do use lube. He finds me attractive so that's not the problem. My questions are: 1) how to last longer as a top? 2) any tips for making bottoms enjoy it more? 3) any ideas as to why he still needs "simultaneous manual stimulation"?
1) I'd say that maybe 2-4 minutes is an adequate amount, and that a technique called "edging" might help you last longer. It'll halt the process, but at least it can resume momentarily. 2) Depending on the position, it can be nice to have a top's hands on you; your chest, legs, thighs, etc. I'll let your imagination give you some ideas, here. 3) Well, think about it. If you're topping, it's a very engaging activity-- with constant thought, thrusting, and movement. Bottoming can be very second-hand and uninvolving-- just laying there. I suspect he wants to participate and enjoy it as much as you do. For that reason, he needs to be manually stimulated while you are too. Otherwise, anal sex can be a very one-sided activity.
What makes sex pleasurable for the bottom is the stimulation of the prostate, and that said, the position is everything. Based on anatomy, the prostate gets the most direct stimulation when the bottom has his legs up over his head.
... also, if you haven't already tried it, you could take some time to stimulate your partner with your finger/s or some good sex toys before getting down to topping him. You'll probably get pleasure out of seeing him respond to the stimulation and it will heighten his, and most likely your own feelings during sex. Give it a try... plenty of lube though!
