So, I am Female to male trans, identify as straight (into women). I imagine a man/men violating me sexually every way possible while I masturbate. I use toys and household objects to shove inside of me to feel the pain and imagine being raped. I was sexually abused by my grandfather for 12 years (age 5-17). Might my fantasy be because of this, or maybe I hate my female body and will do anything to destroy it, or could it be that I really want this to happen to me? I'm so confused. :tears:
Sexual fantasies can be manifestations from unresolved issues. Hate to sound like I'm brushing you off, but... Sounds like you may want to talk to a professional to work out some of that history! If your not already. Sometimes, sexual fantasies are just that, fantasies and dont hold any deeper meaning! Don't worry, your not alone... I've gotten off on some twisted shit. Excuse my language :***: Good luck (*hug*)
