Hi, I'm a newbie. I've just wanted to throw out all of the questions that I've been holding in about anal sex. I identify as a top for now, but I just thought I would inquire about anal sex directly from anyone who has years of experience with it. I heard once that doctors say that anal sex causes some microscopic tears in the anus. That has concerned me for a while and made me feel more guilty about even having anything to do with anal. Does anyone know if this microscopic tearing still happens even if someone is careful (uses lots of lube, relaxes and works up to it slowly)? Even if it does cause tears, are they permanent and is it anything to worry about? As well, I was also wondering if I could get in touch with any older bottoms or vers. here who have years of experience regarding this subject matter, preferably anyone 50+, but if it's not that long of an experience, that's more than fine. I just want to know if your bowel movements are still fine and if you ever douched to prep (despite lots of people saying that it's bad). Sorry if I sound so naive and amateurish & if my question is too broad. I've just recently started making myself at home in the community. I still have a lot to learn & I may not sound really educated lool.
I heard once that doctors say that anal sex causes some microscopic tears in the anus. When using lube and having 'normal' anal sex (i.e. not being really rough, and not doing fisting or anything extreme like that) then any potential damage will be no worse than what you risk every time you go for a bowel movement. The thickness of an average penis is about the same as an average poo, so your anus has no problem dealing with it. You don't need to worry about damage. FYI going for a poo has the potential to cause microscopic damage to your anus too, so it's just scaremongering. I just want to know if your bowel movements are still fine and if you ever douched to prep (despite lots of people saying that it's bad). I'm not in the group you asked but I can comment on douching: Ideally you don't want to do it, and if your diet and bathroom habits are perfect then you shouldn't need to. However a small amount of water (and I do mean very small! Like 20-30mls) can be used just to flush out any residue in the rectum and this generally will be harmless. What you don't want to be doing is doing a full-on enema and flushing out your entire intestinal tract. This will cause problems for you, not only medically but will also wash down waste that was no where near ready to come out and wouldn't have been a problem if you just left it where it was.
I started having anal sex in my teens. I am 39 now... So, I'd venture to say 25 years is enough to probably satisfy your query. I've had one partner who was too rough that did cause some tearing. We had too much to drink and got carried away with a bit too much rough sex. This healed over the course of a few weeks after the event. And yes, it hurt to sit. This was almost 12 years ago and I have no lasting effects. The rest of my partners have been gentle with a bit of insistence thrown in for good measure. And generally speaking I've never had any trouble beyond having a larger penis take longer to get used to. BMs are fine and are more related to diet than anal sex. I've never had any issues after anal sex. But I discovered later in life that fiber is more essential to my diet as I discovered I had a hemorrhoid that was pretty painful. Ridiculous answered your other questions, I hope that clears that up for you. But feel free to ask more if you feel the need.
Thank you so much for your insight, Hyaline. You've definitely let a lot of my anxieties rest lool. But I'd just like to ask, did your having hemorrhoids have anything to do with having anal sex? ---------- Post added 8th Aug 2014 at 03:48 AM ---------- Thanks a lot Ridiculous! I felt so dumb when you pointed out that poo is around the average size as a penis lool. Like duh, It should have occured to me
Nope, it is mostly diet in my case. As we get older, we need to pay closer attention to that and until recently I was still eating like I was 20. Anal sex can cause them if there is enough trauma back there, but going slow and using lube will help with that. If you are worried, let the bottom lead. Or find yourself a power bottom that loves getting pounded mercilessly.. They are out there...
