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Scared to orgasm as a 19 year-old guy, what's wrong with me?

Discussion in 'Physical & Sexual Health' started by Krilky, Aug 14, 2014.

  1. Krilky

    Krilky Guest

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    One time I got pretty close and it was actually really scary. I felt these cramps and stuff, but the scary thing was that I couldn't control my body and what it was doing. I hate that feeling :frowning2:, and that's why I don't ever want to do drugs, cause I never want to lose control. I've heard that when you orgasm there's this moment of not-thinking and that sounds like the scariest thing in the world to me. What's wrong with me :frowning2:?
     
  2. SeaSalt

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    That moment of not thinking is probably the greatest pleasure you can have. Its a few seconds of bliss followed by a feeling of satisfaction.
     
  3. TabletopFan

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    Um, just go through with it. I'm pretty sure after your first time, you won't be worried about "losing control" anymore. And heck, masturbation is a lot healthier than say... doing drugs.
     
  4. SeaSalt

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    Not to mention the sweeeeeeeeeeet pleasure *drools*
     
  5. Ada M7

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    Interesting... Control is an illusion. No one is really in control of anything. People just like to think they are so they can feel better... secure.

    There is no moment of non-thinking btw. I don't know who said that, it's more like, "yes, yes, yes, ooooooooooooaaaaaaahhhhhh yeeea....." *turn on xbox*. I never stop thinking.

    If you wanna talk about what it's like to stop thinking, go tandem skydiving... I assure you, your mind will be a blank slate for the first 10 seconds after jumping out of the airplane :slight_smile:. Primarily because your mind pretty much just goes, "WELP! GOOD JOB! YOU'RE DEAD NOW!!!" Even though, you know you got a professional with a massive parachute strapped to your back.
     
  6. Kai LD

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    If you want to stop thinking get into a life or death situation, especially confrontationally with other people. Otherwise, yeah, not really like that at all.
     
  7. TabletopFan

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    But the french refer to the orgasm as La petite mort aka "the little death" so I think it constitutes a life and death situation... well not really.

    Just do it. DO IT. You won't regret it, trust me. Well unless you end up being a chronic masturbator for repressing orgasms up to such an advanced age. Actually, even then, you won't regret it.
     
    #7 TabletopFan, Aug 14, 2014
    Last edited: Aug 14, 2014
  8. Lexington

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    To a degree, there's a loss of control. You can't really control the ejaculate as it leaves your penis. (In other words, don't point it anything you don't want to clean up.) But truth told, you CAN have an orgasm while maintaining complete control. You can actively maintain control of all your facilities while the orgasm washes over you. So feel free to try again, and power through it. Feel free to deliberately focus on something while you do so - perhaps observe your orgasm in a very clinical way, taking mental notes. ("My penis appears to be throbbing of its own accord now.")

    Speaking for myself, thought, I've found that "letting go" (to whatever degree you feel comfortable doing so) benefits the orgasm immensely. :slight_smile:

    Lex
     
  9. lionel l

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    Have you tried masturbating while sitting on the edge of a sofa?
     
  10. Stridenttube

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    You shouldn't feel any cramps, nothing should be painful at all. In fact, everything should be the exact opposite of pain. If you are feeling physical pain then something is wrong and you need to speak to a doctor.
     
  11. Hyaline

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    Some people say it feels like they need to pee. For me it feels like something is pushing from inside behind where my balls are. Its not an uncomfortable feeling but sorta like when you need to use the bathroom and poo.

    Work on making sure you are in a safe place when you do it. If part of your problem is nerves, then work on relaxing a bit.. If you know you have plenty of time to explore this unknown, you'll be more likely to relax and enjoy it.

    And you will enjoy it.. :slight_smile: Just keep going, once you feel it for the first time, you'll understand a bit better what everyone is talking about..
     
  12. robotman

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    Lol... Dude, you have to just go with it, the feeling of an orgasm is known as the best feeling a human can feel doing something that is natural. Try it out tomorrow, literally make sure you are alone and make sure that no one will bother you for like 30 minutes, then watch some porn. When you get that "feeling" that you are close go with it and continue to do what you are doing, make sure that you have tissue around you aswell lol. It isn't scary at all, you will be fine and I am sure that you will enjoy it.
     
  13. Krilky

    Krilky Guest

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    Thanks for the advice, guys. I'm not having trouble rationally justifying it, and I know if I do it I won't regret it, but every time I try this primordial fear washes over me and it's really annoying :frowning2:
     
  14. Damien

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    Hi,
    no-one as yet has expressed any interest in this, but I will mention again, that there is a way in which to experience a much more mild orgasmic sensation, that is under your control, if you learn the art of drawing orgasm up the spine, before you ejaculate. I've not ejaculated for over a month now, but I've done the drawing up thing and I actually like the mild sensation I get. Anyway I just thought I would put it out there, that not all orgasms are the same; they don't all have to be like 'a hundred volts of pleasure'. What I experience, is about 5% of the intensity of orgasm as it occurs during ejaculation, but I like that. What's more, you get to have as many of the 'milder' ones, as you like. And, instead of feeling drained of energy, you actually gain in energy, by doing this practice. Having said that, there is nothing to fear from spilling your seed once in a while either, and I must admit it does feel pretty good. Sometimes I slip and go over the edge, and when that happens, I just let go and enjoy it, also.
     
    #14 Damien, Aug 15, 2014
    Last edited: Aug 15, 2014
  15. SaleGayGuy

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    Hi Krilky

    My dad died some years ago from prostate cancer and whilst I was researching on the internet I came up with many references that stated regular orgasms especially in your 20s – 30s are an important measure to help prevent prostate cancer in later life.

    So take your time when you won’t be disturbed and using plenty of lube go to town on yourself, let yourself go over the edge and discover this perfectly natural way of relieving stress and help protect your prostate for later life.

    SGG
     
  16. MintberryCrunch

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    I remember sort of feeling this way when I first started masturbating at around age 14. I was sort of afraid to go "all the way". I could feel it building up, but I didn't know what it was going to feel like, so I stopped myself before I could ejaculate. It wasn't about being out of control for me, it was just the "unknown" part that freaked me out. Of course, once I did it I realized all that fear was ungrounded, but I understand what you're talking about.

    I almost feel like "not thinking/out of control" are just poetic descriptions of orgasm more than anything; I don't really feel that way when I orgasm. I've been black-out drunk before so I know a bit about losing control and orgasm isn't like that.

    Anyway, just sharing my experience :slight_smile: