Whenever I'm depressed or stressed, which unfortunately is rather common, I tend to eat my feelings. A few years ago I lost a bunch of weight when I went from eating when stressed to not eating when stressed, I basically starved myself for a year. In the past six months or so I've been stressed out with family issues, cheating ex boyfriend, finding a job after college and have gained a lot of weight. The weight gain in turn makes me more depressed, which makes me want to eat more and the cycle continues. I have practically no coping skills, growing up in a abusive household I turned to food for comfort. I have a extremely bad relationship with food. There have been times lately when I look in the mirror and just want to cry and think how did I let myself gain this weight back. I am taking Lexapro and I know one of the side effects is weight gain, I'm going to talk to my psychiatrist about trying something else since this probably isn't helping with my weight. Does anybody have any tips or tricks to help with the emotional eating cravings?
What triggers your cravings? Do you find yourself going to certain foods? Take note of exactly what's happening if you can. Knowing when, where and with what the problem is most likely to occur is the best way to deal with it. My suggestion for the immediate problem would be to get rid of foods that are high in energy and can be prepared quickly. So ditch the white bread, rice, sweets, sugared yoghurt and so on. It's harder to binge on apples and zucchinis than it is to binge on sweet biscuits and bread. Healthy foods that take a little longer to prepare are a better option; you're unlikely to binge on quinoa or couscous with lemon and pumpkin in the same way you are on a frozen or ordered pizza. It helps prevent a binge in the first place by its longer preparation and its ability to keep you full for longer. Make sure you're never or rarely really hungry; snack on fruit or muesli bars throughout the day. You're less likely to binge if it's difficult and if your body's not hungry. Of course, sometimes a binge gets really out of control and you might eat quite literally everything within your reach, but it's unlikely to start if you don't have access to easy foods that trigger cravings. Any foods that you know are always involved in your binges have to go. Wait before starting to eat. Give yourself ten minutes before you start eating something. Eat a piece of fruit. If you can just stop yourself when the urge comes, it may pass. That's how you should deal with binges in the long-term - once you're more capable of controlling yourself, you can reintroduce what you've taken out of your diet in small amounts. Try having order in the matter of what you eat (though be careful not to be stringent about it and subsequently developing another eating disorder in its place - for God's sake, never count calories and don't even think about purging what you've eaten) so that you can sit down to three meals and a few snacks instead of being forced to "graze", which quickly becomes raiding the pantry with abandon. If you can, prepare what you're going to eat in the morning or whenever you have most control - if you can get out what you need for the day and set aside the ingredients, you've got something to stick to. It helps you to not cook in excess and may stop your desire to just snack on anything instead of eating a proper meal. The real problem at the root of this, that of low self-esteem and escapism, is going to be a lot more complicated to deal with, but fixing the expression of those problems will really help your mind as well as your body.
Aussie792 nailed it right on the head, all his advice is super beneficial. I would though like to also point out as a side note though that if you do happen to screw up periodically (it will happen) FORGIVE yourself! Hating yourself and digging yourself a deeper depression hole only adds fuel to the vicious cycle and your only going to continue to spiral out of control. Forgive and forget put your best foot forward each day. Also, some advice which I have found elsewhere, is that you should try to find a personal relationship and understanding with food. Yes that may sound a bit hippie but realizing that there is something sacred of food to your body and mind certainly does help with establishing food as something to nurture you, rather than the villian. Aussie's advice on cooking your own (healthy nutritious) food is a very good way to start on this. Try a new vegetable/fruit or something every once in a while too and research different nutrients and vitamins in them, so that it becomes an enjoyable activity instead of a punishment. In any case though goodluck!
give that away to friends try a new cookbook and spend time on preparing something with lots of vegetables... you can't gain weight of vegetable soup
some great suggestions here! this is something I deal with too, when I am really stressed out, or lonely, or bored, or a bunch of other emotions. heating up some water and drinking it helps me numb that urge. And I guess that makes sense, because I've read that most of our "hunger" throughout the day is actually thirst because we're not getting enough fluids into our bodies
These are all great suggestions, and necessary for the battle. But to win the war, you have to work on the underlying issues. You've mentioned the abusive household you grew up in, and I vaguely remember some of the postings you were making about that several years ago. So there's likely a lot of built-up shame that's fueling the low self esteem, which, in turn, is driving the eating behaviors. Add to that the learned behavior of food as comfort and it makes perfect sense why this is an issue for you. My experience in working with these issues is that as you work on the underlying stuff, the yo-yo weight process slows down and eventually stops completely. It isn't fun, because you have to go into the shame issues, cultivate ways of understanding them and finding different behaviors, learning self-compassion and finding people who will give you empathy and support (easier said than done.) The best way to do that is with therapy, but even then... you have to find someone who really understands the shame issues and knows how to get to them (and has done his or her own work... which is why so many therapists actually shy away from deep shame work.) There are some powerful 3 day workshops you can go to that can be really helpful, and a number of people in California offer them. That might be a good and not-terribly-expensive way to start. Also, reading Brené Brown's "Gifts of Imperfection" is an excellent way to jump start the process. So the dietary changes are important, but food as a comfort is really no different than any other addiction, and the triggers, benefits, even the biochemistry is the same... so you really do have to attack it from multiple angles. Simply changing the diet, without working through the underlying stuff, is only going to be a temporary fix. Feel free to PM me if you want resources for workshops or individual therapists in your area. I know a fair number of people in CA who do this sort of work.
Thanks guys, I've gone through and gotten rid of most of the junk food I have in my apartment. Basically all I have now is chicken, veggies, soup and some sandwich stuff. I've actually managed to go a few days without eat my feelings, which I swear is a record for me in the past year. Chip, I've been trying to find a good therapist lately, I just keep bouncing around to new ones because we either don't click or I can never get appointments that don't make me skip class. I've also been having some trouble finding therapists reasonably close it me that take my insurance, my parents refuse to pay for it unless it's just the insurance copay and I'm still reliant on them for money. I'm going to try to look harder after the holidays.
