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forgetting how to have anal sex? NSFW

Discussion in 'Physical & Sexual Health' started by Mystory, Dec 28, 2014.

  1. Mystory

    Regular Member

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    Apologies in advance for the graphic content and too much details...I am a bottom during intercourse, and during one particular incident, I had a bit of an accident... From that day on wards, I've been extremely paranoid about having yet another accident again. Mind you, I've had anal sex many, many times and I've bottomed during all of those occasions- but I unexpectedly had an accident during the most recent incident- something that I thought I was well and truly passed...

    So instead, I've been avoiding any form of anal sex as of late, as well as increasing my fibre intake and cutting down on eating in general for the past few weeks, but I now fear that I will have forgotten *how* to bottom since it's been awhile now. When I first started, I had a lot of trouble accommodating *any* size:icon_redf. I'm constantly afraid that if I don't have consistent anal, I will revert back to my prior and inexperienced state, becoming too 'tight' in the sense that I would no longer be able to enjoy any form of anal. Is this possible? Am I being paranoid? Does the elasticity of the anus actually change with experience? Is it possible to mentally and subconsciously forget how to bottom? It took me a LONG time to be able to enjoy bottoming- and I don't want to revert back to the pain and discomfort that I used to experience with it...
     
  2. Sapphire

    Sapphire Guest

    Well, if you "forgot" how to, then that means that you successfully learned to begin with, which means you can learn again, though if you're that worried about it you might want to practice regularly.
     
  3. Chip

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    Hi!

    First, I get how mortifying it can be to have "accidents" but, at the same time, most anybody who has been involved in such activities knows that such things can and do happen now and again. If you have a good relationship with your partner, it should be something you can talk about, perhaps even laugh about, and not let it upset you.

    Second, you won't revert back to your inexperienced state, but things do tend to tighten up after a period of inactivity. As Sapphire said, though, if you've learned it once, you can learn it again. One thing you can do in the meantime is keep a dildo or buttplug around and make regular use of it. That will help you to maintain tone and flexibility down there. :slight_smile:
     
  4. Gen

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    There is no diet that will keep you prepared for anal sex every time the opportunity arises. While I would recommend getting a healthy amount of fiber just for health reasons in general, it sounds as though awareness is the main thing that needs to be improved in this. If you aren't comfortable, don't do it. If you are feeling uncertain, don't do it.
     
  5. Wildside

    Wildside Guest

    yeah, I find that if I just do nothing for a long time, then it does take some more time and attention to get loose and comfortable. But I have not found that it has ever gone back to the way it was the first time, even when I've gone six months without. I think that there is some training of the brain and the body that took place at the beginning, and the body knows the path it has to go back down again. But to avoid the difficulty of "re-starting," I make regular use of a dildo and butt plug. and besides, the dildo is also its own reward, because in addition to keeping things in fighting shape, it is also pleasurable in itself.
     
  6. Mystory

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    Thanks guys for all the advice! that's a real shame that it does tighten up, and I feel as though my partner is doing it on purpose for his enjoyment but I am unsure... Unfortunately I still have reservations about keeping dildos or any form of butt plugs in the event that my roommates or my friends will find it... you see we are pretty close and they often play pranks on me by leaving stuff around (e.g. nicholas cage's face here and there) in my room so I would be mortified if they ever stumbled upon any such things... I guess fingers will have to do for now?
     
  7. Wildside

    Wildside Guest

    well, fingers can be hard to get the same effect. there are dildos that have the right size but are not made to look like a penis, so they don't look so immediately like what they are, and come in festive colors. you can find them on line