Hey, This is wierd probably...but my girl is into me being dominant and talking dirty and I don't really know how to be that way or even what to say on the spot like that. Could i get some advice, examples, help of any kind? I want to learn how to be this way for her. I've tried researching the web....its not really helping....help?:icon_redf
Well without this getting out of hand you could try to tease her... without getting into humiliation... part of this might feel kind of helpless while acted upon, but in a nice way... you could tell her not to move, and play on her with a feather... and tease her, slowly building up an orgasm, then receding, then building up again... you could have a look at strapons... http://emptyclosets.com/forum/anony...uggested-using-strap-would-you-use-her-5.html
well i see it this way...if you don't like it don't read it. This is supposed to be a safe site for support and advice on NUMEROUS topics. I'm not gonna hide myself. Not trying to come across offensive. i'm just looking for advice.
Woah woah slow down gurl. Defensive much? I meant it for myself. The kind of guidance I could give you is not something I would like to have attached to my username. Not because I'm ashamed of it, rather because I don't think what I do behind closed doors is anyone's business but mine and whoever happens to be enjoying themselves with me.
I think he just meant that people would be more likly to reply if it were in that section because people get embarrassed talking about sex but you have nothing to be embarrassed about anyway I also have no idea what to say when someone is talking dirty I get all weird and awkward but you could try tying your hands together or to the bed or role play you being the damsel in destress and her saving you or if you want to be more dominate you can reverse the roles good luck!
(*hug*)I'm sorry Rawrzilla i didn't mean to be defensive. When am I allowed to do private messaging? it still says i can't. ---------- Post added 31st Jan 2015 at 01:47 PM ---------- Thank you jami13llp1993. I just can't figure out how to keep my composure lol
Honestly, I'd suggest talking to your partner. I mean, that seems to be the most practical answer, because even if you did pursue your own independent education on this, it may not be exactly what she'd want. It's hard to tell what is just beyond appropriate, while it's pretty easy to determine what is way beyond appropriate -- that difficult area, I suspect, is what your partner is wanting you to draw from. If your partner is just expecting you to do this, without any guidance or input, she can't rightfully be upset.
Look for the terms 'BD/SM' and 'Safe, sane, consensual', and you'll find what you are looking for. Even if it doesn't look like it, the game is all about respect and to be able to take care of someone. At times you are even playing with the physical integrity of your partner. The more dangerous the game is, the heavier will be the weight upon your shoulders. Ok, back to the dirty talk... If she is new to this, she probably has no idea of what she really likes, or what are her limits. Unfortunately, you (also being inexperienced) can cross the line and end up hurting her, either emotionally or physically. And what comes next could be the most epic fight you two have ever had... I would involve her on your research. Relationships are built on trust, and you need to communicate about your needs, sex being also on the lot. Ask her directly what does she like. Look for videos on the internet (not only porn, some movies have also interesting scenes), and ask her if she likes the setting, the words... What is her idea of being submissive? You two need to sit down, relax and talk about sex naturally, the same you talk about movies or food. Sex is about having fun. Try the dominant role, but don't feel pressured to do anything you don't like or you don't feel ok with. And don't be afraid of hurting : Just keep control of how she reacts at all times. It's not an easy game. You should try some roleplay first, and if you both like it, build it from there.
