I was at camp this past week and on the last night we had a dance. There was a boy who I had met the first day and we quickly became friends. He made some actions towards me and I just want to know if they're considered a sexual assault or since he knew I'm not into guys he was just being platonic or whatever. - He called me beautiful/stunning/etc multiple times - He put his arm around me at the dance to which I pulled away claiming it was too coupley. A girl who was nearby asked him to stop because I blatantly didn't want him touching me but he followed me and asked me what my problem with it was until we got lost in the crowd - He ran up to me during the dance and started to grind on me with him in front - He came up to me while I was playing cards and started rubbing my neck. When I tried to pull away he mockingly asked if I didn't like it while continuing to do it until I slapped his arms away So yeah. Am I overreacting? Was he just being friendly?
I think the grinding and unwanted touching after you declared your disinterest qualifies as assault/harassment to me.
The way I look at it is this way. I'm his friend, He's a man, I'm a lesbian. I'd be all like... if you wouldn't do it with your guy friends, than don't do it with me.... Than he'd probably be like "That's fine, I'm bi!" and than my entire plan would backfire and I'd be doomed to awkwardness. In all seriousness though, it's not sexual assault. Assault is when someone actively tries to rape you or attacks you in a sexual way (Technically, kicking a guy in the balls is sexual assault) This DOES however sound like sexual harassment. Just because you're a woman, doesn't give him the right to treat you any different than any of his other friends. You have to make it clear that he is overstepping his boundries, and if he can't accept that, he obviously doesn't respect you as a friend, and is therefore not you're friend.
If he was grinding on you thats sexual assault as far as I'm concerned. Sexual assault have to be rape. What he did was wrong. If you say no and he continues its sexual assault/harassment. If you don't give consent then its sexual assault/harassment.
Yes, if what he did was nonconsensual and made you uncomfortable as you've described, that is sexual assault. I would either confront him directly and tell him to stop that type of behavior around you or go to a leader you trust.
I'm going to have to disagree with it being assault, but it was harassment. I'm by no means condoning what he did, I've had essentially the exact same thing happen to me and it was not cool. But I do understand he was being a teenage boy, that time when you're a f*ckwad, immature, and your hormones are raging. I don't know if I would escalate this further with authority but I might drop a word in a leader's ear in case this happens again so they're aware and maybe they can talk to him. You might want to pull him aside and talk to him as well.
I'm no expert in law matters but there's differences between assault and battery in general and also with sexual assault and sexual battery. Laws and statutes differ everywhere so it's best to look up your state's laws about these things. In general, unwanted touching is called simple battery, but if it's unwanted touching of the "private parts" then it would be sexual battery. It would be sexual assault if there are other conditions, but that's where research about your state/city laws would come in, just to make sure how they define all these things. Your best bet is to tell someone in authority about what's already happened so they're alert to anything he does. This guy has dismissed your concerns and has followed you around and been rather aggressive with the touching. That he makes a joke of it and questions your own discomfort is not a good sign because that's how he justifies his awful behavior. I don't know if teenage boys have changed that much since I was one but this is the kind of behavior that needs to be corrected sooner rather than later. "Boys will be boys" has covered up lots and lots of sh*tty behavior.
I too am not sure about the Sexual Assault part but at the very least it is Sexual Harassment. Especially since you have told him you are not interested. Having worked as a Supervisor and been part of Management and having had to sit through the classes and training my strongest word of advise is to go to somebody who is in charge of the camp and explain to them what is going on and what is happening. Because if you don't it could escalate to something more.
What he did was not okay and was most certainly sexual harrassment. I don't think it was severe enough to be considered sexual assault. Despite that, you are not overreacting by questioning whether unwanted advances on you are sexual assault. You have a right to react and a right to question.
no, you aren't. if his behavior bothered you to the point that you needed advice about it, on some level you felt violated by what he did. as for it being friendly, a friend doesn't continue to touch you against your will when you say no, and it certainly shouldn't continue to the point where you need to force him to stop.
as has been said above^ I would say it was sexual harrassment. and that he was a complete dick and you don't need people like that! nice girls, instead, yes (*hug*)
It sounds like sexual harassment. If you're going to see him again at camp or whatever you should let someone in charge know about his behavior. And ignore him completely. He isn't a friend, he's just trying to get in your pants. A lot of guys are like that unfortunately.
I would call it sexual harassment, because sexual assault would be like if he grabbed your boobs/ass/vagina or was trying to feel you up.
I'm no expert, but as far as I know Sexual Harassment is a type of Sexual Assault. Sexual Assault is the general term, and according to Wikipedia "Sexual Assault is any involuntary sexual act in which a person is coerced or physically forced to engage against their will, or any non-consensual sexual touching of a person." That includes every single time he touched you after you clearly expressed you didn't like it and were not giving him consent to continue, and if this wasn't serious enough for some people (which should be), grinding against you without your consent it's a big red flag. Don't allow this situation to advance. He has been far too insistent and disrespectful, that's not friendliness and you're not overreacting; the fact that he is a teenager and a boy doesn't justify any of his acts. As others have mentioned already, you should report this to someone in charge, to protect you or to protect someone else. You are being harassed. Take care, I hope this situation stops.
He has certainly crossed some boundaries with his behaviour! What you describe would make me personally uncomfortable but I probably wouldn't want to call security or anything (at that point). If, after you have told him clearly that you don't want that behaviour again and he repeats then he has really crossed a legal line as well as a friendship line and maybe its time to get tougher.
In terms of being a legally chargeable offense, It would not be considered sexual assault in most states, and even in the states where it technically meets the requirement, you'd never get a prosecutor to take up the case. It was certainly harassing and inappropriate behavior. What he did was wrong for sure. Unfortunately, it is also really common, and he's probably learned that this sort of obnoxious behavior often gets him what he wants. It doesn't make it right, but unfortunately it is very common.
By Federal law it is sexual harassment. And I would be the first one to end up in jail for teaching him a lesson. I have been the victim of sexual harassment and as a kid of sexual assault and I have no pitty for those that cross these boundaries especially when they know what the limits are.
