I haven't had sex in years. I can't even hug my mom. I want to have a relationship but human touch is repulsive to me. I know no one will stay with me if I can't put out. Does anyone else here have this problem?
I'm kind of the same way, I don't really like being touched. Unfortunately it doesn't seem to be going away so I know exactly how you're feeling
I have struggled with this for a while now but I think the reason I struggle with it is because I was raped. But I do know that some people just have a different feeling towards intimacy and it's perfectly normal for you to struggle with this
I used to have no problems with hugging people. :eusa_doh: As of the past maybe 8 years or so, I am a lot more closed off when it comes to any physical contact. Not exactly sure the reason. Could be due to depression, feeling bad about not telling people my orientation, not wanting others to see me as weak, etc, etc... I feel like my perception of hugs has changed to considering them painful and me being weak, which is probably unhealthy... I get kind of internally sad when I see people really happy and hugging. The most recent real hug I gave out was a couple weekends ago because a few guys literally said, we're going to support each other and hug each other. I appreciate that and hope I can change and be more open to this without people judging me. Before that, a really good friend hugged me because I was switching jobs. These days, hugs are few and far between, really by my choice... :dry:
Yeah, I have problems like these too. I cannot really express or deal with emotions, and someone touching me feels very strange and sometimes even threatening. I only hug my family members (though rarely), and most of the time they are the ones who initiate it. It makes me feel vulnerable. Fortunately friends don't touch me and I don't touch them, so it's not a problem with them. We shake hands and that's all. A few years ago we had a family lunch in a rural restaurant, and I was sitting with my back towards the kitchen door. The waiter came up to us, and stood beside me, picking up new orders, and he put his hand on my shoulder. It felt nice, but very-very strange. I immediately thought: "Is he gay, or what?" For me touch - except a handshake - indicates some kind of emotional, hostile or sexual intent.
Yes, definitely. I don't remember the last time I showed any form of affection to my parents. Any form of emotional contact seems to just be entirely frozen. I don't know if this is a "gay" issue or just because of family dynamics. My brother (who's not gay) seems to be having the same thing. I used to be very touchy-feely with my friends but even that seems to be dwindling.
While I do touch people, it is often unpleasant, overwhelming or even physically painful to me due to my autism, so I get what you mean.
I'm glad I'm not the only person who feels this. I know much of it is from sexual attacks as a child which resulted in mutilation. I too find that being uncomfortable with myself and orientation makes me feel this way too. I've been this way for many years and I also have trouble showing affection.
You're certainly not the only one who feels like this! If you ever need someone to talk to or just vent we're here to listen! (*hug*)
Yeah completely. I never really liked to hug or touch people as I've gotten older. I don't know if that shows some sort of vulnerability and I don't like showing vulnerability in a sense I guess. And sometimes I just feel violated or something when I make contact with people. I also feel like I've had a couple of awkward hugs that make me rethink about giving hugs to people.
