Hi everyone, Is it normal to not get erect the first time during gay sex? I'm 27 and recently came out as Bi mid last year but only just had my first ever gay sexual experience four days ago. The guy who i did it with f#$king hot and everyone at work thinks so too but I couldn't get erect!! I was shaking from nerves, it was 7am in the morning so I was tired, plus his dick is huge which was very intimidating. Not to mention I was also 'partaking' to cope with the nerves. I never had this problem with my ex GF. WTF??? Now the guy has described the experience has 'terrible' and 'awkward'. Advice? Has anyone else had the same issue?
Well, you already said all the reasons why what you experienced is perfectly normal! Nervous Tiredness Intimidation That would keep just about anyone from becoming erect!
^ Agreed. The situation just doesn't sound like you were relaxed enough to get hard. It happens. It also seems like you were with a total asshole. Sorry that you had a bad first experience, but don't beat yourself over it!
I would agree with the others, from what I know you need to be awake relaxed and ready to have sex. Stress can always prevent that from happening if you were nervous and stressed it would prevent that from occurring. Don't let that keep you down, there are other fish in the sea.
I can see why it would be awkward. Does he understand that it was your first with a guy? It's perfectly normal. As those who've already replied... All that and more can cause numerous things to happen. I've experienced the same thing you are talking about. The guy I was with, his was as wide as a can of soda. Uh-NO! No way was that thing that monster getting anywhere near me, let alone inside me. haha Needless to say that he and I never spoke again after that night. It was more on my part than his, but I just couldn't. It wasn't just the fact that he would have most definitely ripped me a new one but I myself was just too nervous and tired from working so late and not mention I needed sleep and it was almost as early as you are talking about. For me, it wasn't a first encounter as in my first but one with whom I hadn't dated nor was going to, we were only friends. I had only know him for a short time. How about this scenario... I had one other experience that turned out awkward. I happened to explode once when the guy didn't even touch me or really do anything for that matter. All we did was make out and then take our clothes off! Man that was embarrassing. Not to mention it ended at that moment, clothes back on! haha Lets just say that we never got past it either. Our dating ended shortly after that experience.
You're nervous, you're tired. It's natural for things not to go smoothly even in ideal circumstances. If it happens next time, just go slow and be open with whoever your sex partner is about the situation. I think you'll find most people are pretty understanding. There's nothing wrong with you.
