I dealt with depression for two years and a half, from october 2013 to april 2016 aproximetely. I was treated with anti-depressants during all that time. Until like october-november 2015, though I was deeply deeply depressed and treated with anti-depressants, I still had a "normal sex drive" : I could still experience morning erections, have erections when I saw an attractive men/women or sexually explicit pictures/videos. But back to october 2015, I began to have some other psychological problems (which I'm not going to detail because it would be long and boring) and my sex drive completely... VANISHED. Then, I went to the hospital, I was given other anti-depressants and I finally recovered april-may 2016 and quitted medication with the agreement of my psychiatrist. BUT since then, my sex-drive is still pretty much non-existent, it's like I can still have some erections, but they don't last long and I don't feel anything .The thing is : I don't know why... I've talked about it to my psychiatrist, and she made me do some blood tests to measure my testoterone levels and so on and so on and I was also sent to the urologist to check my genitals. Aaaaand surprisingly everything is fine !! My psychiatrist says that it could be subconscious thoughts that make me "block my sex drive" and that I should work on it with a psychologist. But... I don't know what to think. I feel sooo alone with this. I tried to do some researches on the internet, but I didn't find anything. Has anyone already experienced this ? Is it actually possible for someone born sexual to become asexual ? Thank you so much for reading <3!! Any thought would be hugely appreciated ! Have a great day/night/evening
I guess it could be possible, but there would have to be some driving factors behind it for such a thing to happen. For instance, there are some antidepressants that can kill one's libido. Given that I'm not an expert on medicine nor do I know what it is that you were taking, I wouldn't be able to say that it could be an effect from your medication, although imo 5-6 months after quitting seems like a long time for the side effects to still be present, but again I'm no expert. With that being said, maybe speaking with a psychologist would be a good course of action for you to take. You mentioned that you had a bout of depression, which can also have an affect on one's libido and could have potentially did something mentally which could "block your sex drive." Given that it's a possibility, it would be worth the effort to speak with a psychologist to find out if this is indeed a mental occurrence. Again I'm no expert, but I hope some of what I said helps. Good luck and please update!
The first thing that comes to mind is the antidepressant medications you're on. Depending on which one(s), that could be a large part of the culprit right there, as the way SSRIs and most other antidepressants work often has, as a byproduct, depression of sexual drive and arousal. Depression itself is also strongly correlated with a decrease or complete lack of sex drive. The unconscious block idea is possible but seems less likely given the apparent suddenness in which it came on. One thing that I can suggest with a pretty high degree of certainty: The problem is transient and will eventually resove itself once you address the underlying cause. So, just for the record, what you're describing would qualify as low or extremely low sex drive, but it wouldn't meet the definition of asexual, if we are using the widely-used and accepted definition. I'm sure this is upsetting, expecially when there's no ultra-easy fix. The good news is, I do feel confident that once you address the underlying issues, your sex drive will likely return in full force.
You can't become asexual. Asexuality has nothing to do with sex drive. They can have even higher sex drives than sexuals, but they just lack attraction to other people and masturbate. Sexuals can have low sex drives, but are still attracted to x gender. The main problem sounds like depression and medication. The effects can linger on for a long time, even when you leave the medication. So trying to find a psychologist is the best thing to do.
I really don't know if one can become asexual. I think people's sexualities have changed, but I really don't know too much about that. Because this sudden change happened so close to your depression, it is more likely that this is an after-effect of the depression or medication. Say your sexuality really changed and you are now asexual, I think it's far too early to tell, considering all the surrounding factors that can lead to symptoms that seem like asexuality. So your best bet now is really a psychologist.
Thank you so much for your answers guys !!! I was afraid nobody would understand my english haha. killswitch0029 --> Yes, that's the thing. I recovered from depression and quitted the medication 5-6months ago so it's definitely a time too long for this to be caused by medication side effects. Moreover I was on medication for 2years and my sex drive was ok, it's just when my psychological problems changed one year ago that it affected my sex drive. This is so weird.. I guess it's the last solution... cause I don't see anything else.. Errr I'm so fed up with talking to psychologists u_u. You did help ! Thank you for taking the time to answer ! Chip---> The weird thing is, I completely recovered from depression and quitted medication 5/6 months ago... So it can't be caused by those two things I guess, thats why my psychiatrist said it was probably an "unconscious thing" but I just can't see how something unconscious could affect that much my sex drive.. Oh ok, I'm so uneducated about everything surrounding asexuality so it really made me question. I really hope so ! Thank you for your support ! --> Creativemind I didn't know that ! Like I said above, I'm so uneducated about asexuality... Thank you for this information. I think it's the only valid hypothesis ! Did you go through depression phase yourself ? I ll definitely try to talk to a psychologist ! Brytaleith----> You're probably right! I also happen to experience some attraction but it is sooo weak, so I guess I just have a weak sex drive for now !
I'm not going to quote because I'm lazy, but I'll answer your question directed toward me. I'm also a sexual with a low sex drive and low attraction at the moment. I have dealt with depression for a long time and I am on a type of birth control that is known to remove sex drive completely (I use for health reasons, not for sexual ones). I personally just don't mind having a low sex drive though, and even prefer it. Being too sexual is kind of a distraction, especially if you're single. And I still deal with some feelings of self-homophobia and fear of sex that makes me a bit averse toward it. If you're dating someone though, it can become an issue and harm the relationship. I think most people with low sex drives can have it fixed if they view it as a problem.
