Hi everyone, First happy thanksgiving to those who celebrate! So my boyfriend and I are taking things slow since we are both virgins and have only given each other handjobs. However I've realized that he's lasting like up to 10 minutes before orgasming while I'm only lasting like a few, and I'm trying to understand why this is and why I seem so much more sensitive. He's only a few years older than me so that should not have anything to do with it and moreover, he seems to have more powerful orgasms, at least vocally. We are both cut and I'm bigger than him down there but I don't know if that would really have anything to do with it. At first I thought maybe I'm doing it wrong with my hands and I tried a few different techniques and but he seems to get off really strong and had a nice finale. For me, it only takes a few minutes and I'm confused as to why I can't last as long and what I could do to help. Any thoughts or suggestions? Thanks!
Every partner I have been with has been different. How long it lasted, emotional response, how much he ejaculated, how wet she got, etc. When with someone new I fall into the go quick category. What I found helped me is self exploration. Learn your own body response to stimulation and what areas and how far you can push or test without having an orgasm.
Don't kegel when you are doing it. You have to be relax down there. Most people will get excite and likely to kegel when play down there. If you kegel during those activities, it will make you cum faster. You only kegel and hold it when you are about to cum to stop it. Then you change to foreplay until the urge to cum subsided. If you want to shoot far then you kegel then release then kegel, repeat it (not too fast tho) until you are about to cum then let go of kegel and you will shoot far.(don't kegel it too hard tho.) (kegel is when you contract your pelvic floor muscles, aka the action that you use to stop peeing)
I would suggest masturbation and practicing "stop and go". Observe the sensations, and when you feel like you're going to ejaculate, stop and relax. Do this several times so before allowing yourself to ejaculate, and you'll find that you have the awareness of your body to know how to regulate the length of time during sex. Also, I recommend masturbating without pornography, but instead exploring your own body and sensations. Hope that helps, Patrick
