1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.

Homophobic doctors

Discussion in 'Physical & Sexual Health' started by moonshine, Mar 26, 2010.

Thread Tools

Thread Tools

Page 1 of 2
  1. moonshine

    moonshine
    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Feb 3, 2010
    Messages:
    11
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Beautiful New Jersey
    Gender:
    Male
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Okay. Normally I don’t actively come out to doctors I go to, unless I feel that this is somehow pertinent to the present medical condition. Yesterday I did, and was swiftly punished.

    The doctor was a laryngological specialist to which my usual physician had referred me, to evaluate whether or not my tonsils should be removed. Before the actual examination she asked me a couple of background questions: what I do for a living, where I live, if I come in contact with any hazardous chemicals etc – and whether or not I’m married or engaged. I replied: “No I don’t have a steady boyfriend right now”. I probably should have just kept my big mouth shut. She was visibly surprised, but then went on with the questioning and subsequently the examination.

    At the end of the examination she told me that my tonsils didn’t have to be removed just yet, but she added that I really needed to do something about my AIDS infection. What? She said “Well, you know, it’s a well known fact that AIDS is caused by homosexual sex.” She then proceeded with a 5 minute pseudo-scientific lecture about how the enzymes of other men’s sperm somehow destroy the T-cells. Fortunately for me, a friend of hers, the renowned Prof. So-and-so, has found a natural remedy that can prevent my blood from other gay men's poisonous enzymes. When I replied that all available science indicates that AIDS is caused by HIV, she replied that I shouldn’t believe them, as “obviously there has to be another reason why all gay men eventually get AIDS” – just the kind of circular logic I love…

    Although this was the first time someone went as far as trying to sell me a cure for my non-existent HIV infection, it wasn’t the first time doctors have assumed that I had to be HIV-infected when I told them that I was gay. Although it’s not a problem with my regular doctor/dentist/etc, it has happened a couple of times when I got referred to specialists.

    I’m always a bit torn when I get quizzed about my relationship status: Be honest and risk something like the above or just lie to avoid any such absurd discussions. I was wondering: what do you usually do?
     
    #1 moonshine, Mar 26, 2010
  2. Beachboi92

    Beachboi92
    Full Member

    Joined:
    Jul 26, 2009
    Messages:
    1,099
    Likes Received:
    1
    when that bitch said that i would have replied "woah woah woah 1) i don not have AIDS and neither do all gay men 2) the largest group at risk of AIDS is str8 women ages 18-26 and 40+ (i believe that is the statistics) 3) Considering that you are diagnosing me with a medical condition i don't have that is not at all related to your field of medicine by simply learning i am gay i'd like a different doctor and for you to shut your dumb fucking mouth and actually learn to speak about what you know, because frankly it is insulting and very unbecoming of someone who is supposed to be an intelligent, objective medical professional."

    And i would have reported her if there is a way, considering if she did this to you she prob does it to anyone she has as a patient who are gay men.....
     
    #2 Beachboi92, Mar 26, 2010
  3. Lexington

    Lexington
    Full Member

    Joined:
    Dec 20, 2007
    Messages:
    11,409
    Likes Received:
    11
    Location:
    Colorado
    Gender:
    Male
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    It's one thing to run into a homophobic doctor - I'm sure they exist. But she has NO clue about HIV or AIDS. Any doctor who says "you shouldn't believe" all you've heard about AIDS is somebody who shouldn't be practicing medicine. Does she have some similar ideas about cancer and the like? As if that's not enough, well, how convenient - she's got a "friend" who has come up with a "natural remedy". I wouldn't be surprised if there's a bit of a finder's fee in it for her.

    I have no idea where on the planet you are, but as problematic as the American medical system is, I can't imagine any doctor here pulling this sort of thing. If you ARE in the US, immediately go back to your primary physician and say what happened. "I mentioned to the specialist that I was gay, and she told me I needed to do something about my AIDS infection. Then she told me she had a friend who came up with some 'natural enzyme' to treat it. This despite the fact that I'm not HIV+, and have never been exposed to the AIDS virus."

    Lex
     
    #3 Lexington, Mar 26, 2010
  4. moonshine

    moonshine
    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Feb 3, 2010
    Messages:
    11
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Beautiful New Jersey
    Gender:
    Male
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    >I wouldn't be surprised if there's a bit of a finder's fee in it for her.

    Oh I'm absolutely certain there is. At $50 per week's supply of this stuff I'm sure there is plenty of room for kickbacks.

    I'm definitely going to report back to my primary physician on this, especially since he'll want to know why I'll not be seeing this doctor for further treatment.
    I was also thinking about reporting this to the the relevant authorities as I'm almost positive this isn't legal (May a doctor sell medication to patients ??) - but then decided against it since she'd probably just deny it ever happened.

    But since this notion of gay = AIDS seems to be so widespread even amongst medical professionals - off the top of my head I can count 4 different doctors over the years that couldn't be convinced that I didn't have AIDS - I think this is actually a serious problem. Or is it just my particular bad luck ?
     
    #4 moonshine, Mar 26, 2010
  5. mingimarsdottir

    mingimarsdottir
    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Mar 16, 2010
    Messages:
    7
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Garðabær, Iceland
    Gender:
    Female
    Sexual Orientation:
    Lesbian
    Out Status:
    Not out at all
    My biology teacher mentioned to our class just the other week that it is illegal for doctor's to recommend any medication that is not FDA approved. I would definitely report her.
     
    #5 mingimarsdottir, Mar 26, 2010
  6. Phoenix

    Phoenix Guest

    Yeah she needs to be reported. Anyone who acts that strongly like an idiot after the years of education it takes to become a doctor needs a reality check.
     
    #6 Phoenix, Mar 26, 2010
  7. Spectre

    Spectre
    Full Member

    Joined:
    Mar 2, 2010
    Messages:
    259
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Canada
    Seriously, I would get a second opinion on your tonsils after reading that story. Honestly, how could you trust someone that ignorant?
     
    #7 Spectre, Mar 26, 2010
  8. Mirko

    Mirko
    Admin Team Advisor Full Member

    Joined:
    Apr 26, 2008
    Messages:
    18,884
    Likes Received:
    3,221
    Location:
    Northern Hemisphere
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    That's exactly what I was think about when I read your post. I think you should see another doctor. If your doctor is charging you for the visit, I would ask for an reimbursement or not pay it.

    I think you should wright a letter and send it to the medical association or licensing body responsible for general practitioners, because that doctor shouldn't be a doctor!
     
    #8 Mirko, Mar 26, 2010
  9. Lexington

    Lexington
    Full Member

    Joined:
    Dec 20, 2007
    Messages:
    11,409
    Likes Received:
    11
    Location:
    Colorado
    Gender:
    Male
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    >>>But since this notion of gay = AIDS seems to be so widespread even amongst medical professionals - off the top of my head I can count 4 different doctors over the years that couldn't be convinced that I didn't have AIDS - I think this is actually a serious problem. Or is it just my particular bad luck ?

    What country are you in? As I said, this certainly isn't prevalent in America. I can MAYBE imagine running into one doctor in some tiny town who wanted to believe something that screwy, but I sure as heck can't picture running into four. I've had four main physicians over the last twenty years or so (due to moving), and I think I told all four I was gay. Nobody cared. One wanted to be sure I was playing safe, to which I said "Right now, I'm not playing at all". We both laughed at that, and the conversation moved on. I had to show my butt to my current doctor recently, and neither of us had any issue with that. That's the way it's supposed to be, I think.

    Lex
     
    #9 Lexington, Mar 26, 2010
    Last edited: Mar 26, 2010
  10. RaeofLite

    RaeofLite
    Full Member

    Joined:
    Apr 7, 2009
    Messages:
    1,344
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    BC, Canada
    Wow. I'm sorry to hear about your incident. :confused: She obviously has never come into contact with any gay people. Or very little in her profession. Either that or she refuses to treat them and wanted an excuse once she found out you were. Which is downright sad...

    People in the medical field, doctors, paramedics, dentists, etc come into contact with all types of people. Surely they are educated in school that they will come into contact with different types of people and are told to deal with it like any other patient?
     
    #10 RaeofLite, Mar 26, 2010
  11. Roralo

    Roralo Guest

    Shes a doctor?
     
    #11 Roralo, Mar 26, 2010
  12. donnie5

    donnie5
    Full Member

    Joined:
    May 31, 2007
    Messages:
    342
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    omaha, ne
    Is this a joke? what kind of back woods 1950's doctor was this? my 16 year old niece knows more about something then a doctor? she should have her medical license revoked
     
    #12 donnie5, Mar 26, 2010
  13. Johnnieguy

    Johnnieguy
    Full Member

    Joined:
    Jan 16, 2010
    Messages:
    355
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Twin Cities, MN
    A lesbian friend of mine was once asked by her doctor if she was sexually active.

    She replied, "yes" to which the doctor asked what method of birth control she was using.

    My friend said "I'm a homosexual." That shut the doc up pretty good!

    The moral of the story is, doctors, just like any other group of people need to be educated about GLBT issues.
     
    #13 Johnnieguy, Mar 26, 2010
  14. joeyconnick

    joeyconnick Guest

    Joined:
    Apr 12, 2005
    Messages:
    3,069
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Toronto, ON
    Gender:
    Male
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    I have to echo: where on EARTH are you in the world that someone with a medical background, let alone a license, would say something so unbelievably OUTRAGEOUS?! She should be... whatever the medical equivalent of being disbarred is! I guess have her license to practice completely and utterly revoked. For all time. Maybe be thrown in prison for criminal ignorance.

    I mean, that's not homophobic, it's just INSANE! It's 2010, for goodness sake!

    In related news, I'm completely sorry you had to go through that. I would say unless you are convinced your sexuality may have something to do with a condition, just avoid mentioning it unless you're specifically asked (maybe not even then) given it appears your area/region is full of ignorant medical practioners. I don't really see what being married or engaged has to do with your tonsils anyway, but I would have just said, "No, I'm not."
     
    #14 joeyconnick, Mar 26, 2010
  15. Sylver

    Sylver
    Full Member

    Joined:
    Jan 12, 2010
    Messages:
    934
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Kenora, Ontario
    This is pretty much one of the dumbest things I've ever heard... What a twat. I would probably have walked out at that point and either gone straight to the primary care physician or called him/her and complained. This person shouldn't be eligible to call herself a doctor...

    Interestingly a while back my doctor asked me similar questions, and then outright asked me if I was gay. I told him yes (so technically he was the 3rd person I ever came out to!). He sort of duly made a note in my file, but he didn't seem put off by it or anything and he hasn't brought it up since. And he sure as heck didn't ask me if I had AIDS or try to sell me some kind of herbal AIDS remedy...
     
    #15 Sylver, Mar 26, 2010
  16. Zach1992

    Zach1992
    Full Member

    Joined:
    Jan 6, 2010
    Messages:
    974
    Likes Received:
    1
    Location:
    New York (State, not city)
    That bitch definitely needs to be reported for spreading false medical information & being just a total bitch.
     
    #16 Zach1992, Mar 26, 2010
  17. Revan

    Revan
    Full Member

    Joined:
    Jun 22, 2005
    Messages:
    7,853
    Likes Received:
    36
    Location:
    Canada
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    I think this doctor could get her medical license removed. Seriously this is the most ridiculous thing I've EVER heard from the medical world. I just....WOW
     
    #17 Revan, Mar 27, 2010
  18. Chip

    Chip
    Board Member Admin Team Advisor Full Member

    Joined:
    May 9, 2008
    Messages:
    16,560
    Likes Received:
    4,757
    Location:
    northern CA
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    First, are we talking medical doctor (MD), physician's assistant, nurse practitioner, or naturopathic physician (ND)?

    I think you said it's a specialist, so I'd guess MD. But if it's any of the first three, I would absolutely file a formal report with the state medical licensing board. There are several clear violations of a reasonable standard of care evident in what the doctor said, and I believe there may be criminal liability in claiming HIV infection in someone who doesn't have it. If this woman is a licensed medical professional, she really needs not to be.

    If it's an ND, I would report her to the licensing board (if you're in a state or province with licensure) or to the police otherwise (she is clearly exceeding the scope of what an unlicensed person could be doing.)

    This is messed up beyond belief and you really should take action, because this woman could really, really harm someone.
     
    #18 Chip, Mar 27, 2010
  19. Swamp56

    Swamp56 Guest

    Huh. Are you sure she was a physician, and not a physician assistant or nurse practitioner? I would report the person regardless.
     
    #19 Swamp56, Mar 27, 2010
  20. TheEdend

    TheEdend Guest

    Exactly what I was thinking haha sucks that you have been running into people like this.
     
    #20 TheEdend, Mar 27, 2010
(You must log in or sign up to post here.)
Page 1 of 2