Right, basically, I suffer from pretty severe paruresis, and I have less than a year to fix it. Like, I would like to fix it as soon as possible, but it *must* be 100% fixed before this point in time. I have trouble pissing in most public toilets, in a toilet in a house other than mine, or in my house when there is someone (other than my parents or brother) in the house...there are some public toilets that I can deal with, because I have gotten used to them...and although it normally takes a few attempts, I can manage...it isn't to do with the cleanliness of the toilet, because one of them isn't quite top notch. Also, if I really need to go and I'm in one of the ones that I'm used to, I can still go even if someone is there... I used to have a really bad conscious phobia of public toilets, but now I don't at all, but I think it is still lingering subconsciously. The only conscious problem I have with them now is that I know that I will not be able to piss particularly easily there.... tl;dr, how do I fix this 100%?
I doubt I could provide a lot of help, before you made that thread I didn't even knew this trouble existed. I did a quick search over the internet and I have found a few links you may find helpful though : http://www.paruresis.org/ http://www.paruresisadvice.com/ http://www.ukpt.org.uk/ You can also contact directly our medical advisor on EC Karabulut, he may have some ideas on your matter. Good luck and take care, Cécile
from what you describe it doesn't seem to be THAT severe. but why do you need to have this fixed "100%" in less than a year? due to the psychological nature of the problem, the one likely thing is that if you are pressuring yourself that hard it will be only more difficult. so maybe it is better to resolve that future thing first ..
And that is what the issue is. Humans have the ability to remember emotion. So, when we experience an unpleasant emotion in a particular situation, we begin to associate the emotion with the situation. This accounts for "stage fright", inability for guys to stay hard during sex, being pee-shy and a host of other "fear of failure" situations. Just because something happens one time, it doesn't mean that it will happen every time. The issue here is not that you can't pee in public. The issue is that you're afraid you don't be able to pee in public. You're anticipating that you're going to fail before you even try. The links that Eleanor Rigby gave have some helpful information. If this is bothering you and you can't work through it on your own, you might want to look into a few sessions with a therapist to help you work through your fear. Treatment for phobia is very successful and can usually be handed with a few sessions with a good therapist.
Thanks guys Well, it has to be fixed, because I'll be abroad for 5 days with people I barely know (Y) I'll have close friends there, but they're girls, so they won't be my roommates. Yesterday I actually managed to use the college loos :O but then today I tried and thought right I managed yesterday so I can today, but then failed, I think I subconsciously was worrying I was going to fail. The thing is, the fact that I have to 'know' the toilet and even then it's effort, and it has to be pretty much silent, doesn't help when I'm going to have to pop to the loo quickly sometimes when it's busy and a weird toilet :/ It probably doesn't sound that bad but I worry whenever I leave the house for more than 4 hours that I'll need to piss :/ I will consider finding a therapist, although I am not sure how feasible that would be...they are much harder to find in the UK and my mother would have to find out :/
