How to cut back on drinking from so many times a week to every few weeks

Hi, Everett.

You probably aren't going to want to hear what I have to say, but I'll say it anyway: There is a strong genetic component to alcoholism, and so if you have it in your family, particularly in more than one family member, it is very unlikely you will be successful in being able to drink moderately. The overwhelming majority of people who have problems with alcohol use and come from alcoholic families find they are not able to mediate use and must abstain completely.

Can you talk a little bit more about what your alcohol use patterns are? What are you drinking, how often, and how many days out of a week, and out of a month? That will help us to give you more insight into your particular situation.

 

Hmmm.

Well... how often do you drink with friends? How many days a week, and how many weeks a month?

First, I'll say that a large percentage of people your age probably drink as much as you're describing on an occasional basis. But then again... I've learned to ask the question "what is a drink" because I once had someone tell me they only had two drinks per night, but they were 24 ounce Long Island Iced Teas, and half of one of those would knock many people on the floor

The bigger issue I see is the pattern toward bingeing, and I do think there's a bit of denial going on with the "I never care about getting drunk but just enjoy the taste", as that's one of the most common excuses alcoholics use.

Additionally, there are plenty of 'functional alcoholics' who don't drink to blackout, don't drive drunk, don't cause problems for others. So my concern is that you seem to think you have a problem, and if you are concerned, you probably do.

One suggestion I'd make is to set a boundary for yourself. Tell yourself you'll go the next 3 or 4 months without any alcohol (I'm suggesting that long because you've already said you can go for weeks, so I'm intentionally suggesting a longer period than the maximum you would normally go.) And notice what happens as you do that. If you find yourself actively waiting for, yearning for, and imagining the next time you can drink... you have a problem. If the time goes by and you don't think about it hardly at all... then you probably don't have a big problem.

But given the history in your family, you are at much higher risk than someone who doesn't have the family history, so my best advice would be to start now and work toward finding other activities instead of drinking to do with your friends, because the disease (and alcoholism is considered a disease by most mental health professionals) is progressive, so if you don't nip it now, it's likely to be a lot more problematic over time.