I had let this site go for a while, but I am back and I need some serious help. I have been battling depression for about 6 months now. I have tried to kill myself twice now. I have been drinking and I know I need to stop. I need someone who can help me. TO keep things short..... I have been drinking to the point where most nights I can barely stand. This has been going on for about a month now. The nights that I am not drinking, I have cut myself. I have tried to kill myself. Both times were unsuccessful My social life is gone. Most of my friends have stopped talking to me for one reason or another, and I spend most of my time alone at this point. None of them know that I am gay, that I am drinking, or that I am suicidal. I don't even know why most of them have stopped talking to me. I try to branch out to them, and they just ignore me. My family life isn't much better. My dad and I do nothing but fight when he is home. My mother is rarely home, and neither is my dad. They are both out either working or spending time with my sister. Like a lot of time. They are out almost every day from 4 to 9, sometimes later. When ever my dad is home we fight about whatever my dad wants to fight about, and whenever my mom is home she is to tired to really talk much. I was in a relationship, but that ended. I think I let that start my depression. I dont really want to put the details in here. Ask if you really want to know. I dont want things to be like this. I know that I can fix it, I just need a little help. Please message me.
Hey there, and welcome back. At 15, this is pretty serious. It would be serious regardless of your age, but for you to have gotten here by age 15 is severe. But at the same time, it's good because you haven't spent years in this state, so reversing this trend is possible. But you'll need help. This is likely too much for you to try to take on yourself, but you'll need to stop drinking, stop cutting, and focus instead on things that will improve your life. If you think that your drinking isn't affecting you or your friendships, you're mistaken. It clearly is. It's no coincidence that your friends aren't hanging out with you. Feel free to reach out to me directly or keep posting here.
Hey Jack, You do need help and there is absolutely nothing wrong with that. It is obvious that you are going through a really tough spot right now and you really need to reach out to someone either in your school or in your community who you know that you can trust. If you do not feel safe reaching out to your family then do not risk it. Is there anyone that you could confide in? Even not necessarily just about your sexuality but with your depression. You need someone to lean on. You're only 15, your social status is temporary and so is your depression. You've got so much to live for. I know I'm one to talk, I myself have been experiencing depression. It Sucks. We all deserve a safety-net and for years my home was not a safe place where I could be myself. I have attempted suicide and I was in the hospital only just last month. My friends didn't accept me for who I was and we lost connection. I can relate. Im not forcing my issues upon you, Im just letting you know that you're not alone. We all run into tough spots, and unfortunately for many people in the LGBT community those dark periods are more frequent and common. We face so much inner conflict that it's hard to even think about reaching out. As for the drinking, please stop! Its not helping. Alcohol is a depressant and will only make you more depressed. If you cannot reach out to your mom or dad and tell them the state you are in, find a counselor in school. Desperate times call for desperate measures. Theres no shame in needing help, especially when you are only 15. You realize that you don't want things to be like this, awareness is a huge start. By posting you are expressing and realizing that you're facing problems. If you can talk to your mom then do it! She's your mom and any mother would never want to hear that there kid is having so much trouble. It sounds like your dad wouldnt be the best person to talk to as you fight a lot, but you never know. We don't want you to be put into a dangerous situation by talking to someone who will pose a threat. Please don't hurt yourself. It Gets Better Project | Give hope to LGBT youth Preventing Suicide Among LGBTQ Youth | The Trevor Project
