This all started around 3 years ago. I have these times when I feel maniacly depressed and angry, and have gone to extents like plotting mass shootings at my school, and numerous other buildings. Even when I walk down the street I'll walk past a group of people and want to just shoot them all. I've already talked to the school councillor, but he did nearly nothing, it helped to get it out, but I still feel angry and violent. Please help.
Hi, and thank you for being honest with your feelings. Are you sure these feelings are truly what you want? Or are they just intrusive thoughts that won't go away? Do these thoughts scare you? Does the thought of shooting people make you feel better? Sorry for all the questions. I'm just trying to rule out possible reasons.
When I'm fully held up in the moment, all I want to to shoot people (not children though). They go away but it jumps back into my mind with the smalled provocation. When I think about it, I feel slightly scared about it, but if I put myself watching news of the shooting, I don't feel guilt or sadness.
A school counselor probably isn't qualified to help you with that, unless they're actually trained in psychology. You'd probably be better off with a professional.
The fact that you are seeking help and advice from us lets me know that deep down, you truly do not want to hurt anyone. I think you may be experiencing a lot of anger and frustration. The reason I was asking those questions is because I was wondering if maybe you might be having OCD related intrusive thoughts. Try googling that and see if that's what's going on. The best thing to do is to see a professional. They will be able to help you. I know this because they helped me. Though, I didn't have homicidal urges, but I did have suicidal ones. I know it's a scary thought. I thought to myself, "How will anyone be able to help me? My mind is too screwed up." But I was so wrong. And there is help for you, especially since you want it.
It sounds to me like it could be a problem not so much with anger, but with where to put it. Random people are not to blame for your life stress. If you feel the urge to destroy for catharsis, consider where you'd actually be if you followed through with it. Buckets of innocent blood on your hands, and would it have made your life better? Not for a second. Try to find the root of these feelings. What factor in your life makes you feel like you're not in control?
I second RSwordsman and whoever that mentions finding root of your feelings. that, and also finding professionals. and um, try meditation? try clearing your mind to find what is causing these feelings? <- not a professional
do you have many people in your life you can vent to.looks like you are struggling alone with issues aye.
I have been struggling with homicide ideation i am married talked to a preacher and my wife my mom and dad i am 21 and i have no help no insurance but am religious and when i go through these sick thoughts i try to ignore but they come strong to the point i panic and want to be held i get scared yes i am really married and so i tell my wife and she helps me. I get thoughts saying "what if?" What if i went insane and killed my wife and everyone then i reach my break and fall on my knees and pray hard. Im no psychopath. I actually fear of hurting people i sometimes think of calling 911 saying i dont deserve to be free. I feel i belong in prison so i dont or cant harm no one. Please give me advise. Anyone just dont scare me i will freak out i have panic attacks and anxiety real bad. I was once normal all my life till before i turned 21 then these thoughts came and now i ask God will i ever be the same so in him i put my faith and will live in his name. Pray to be rescued he is refuge. I had fought suicide ideation though never acted on it nor attemted but the homicide ideation is a challenge to beat
