Hi there. I've been struggling with depression for the past few years. It's really not a fun time. It's not a nice feeling to wake up everyday hating your own guts. Wishing you weren't such an abomination. Avoiding mirrors cause you can't even stand the sight of yourself. Staying up all night, questioning yourself. I'm not suicidal, so please don't post stuff about that, I was just kinda wondering how many of you guys had had experience with depression, and how you guys worked through it. I know you guys probably get alot of shit like this, but this is such a nice community that I figured you wouldn't be too harsh. Thanks in advance.
Still experiencing it, it's difficult to tackle it when it drains you of motivation to do anything. There's days where I do nothing but lie down and listen to music while daydreaming. Then I realize my life is nothing like my fantasy life and I'm not worth this life of mine. Then there's the fact it feels like nothing I do will ever be good and what's the point in doing anything. But whatever... Lately though I have been taking steps towards overcoming it. Some advice I can give to you and others is to talk to someone about it. I did two months ago to my parents after it got too much to bear and cover up, it didn't resolve my depression but it has started to get the ball rolling.
I dealt with a significant bout of depression a few years ago that I'm still recovering from. The two things that most helped me were therapy and not isolating, spending time with my friends.
I've dealt with it for years. I was on prescription meds for awhile, but the side effects are just unpleasant. I'm using St John's Wort now which isn't a miracle drug by any means but I feel like it has definitely raised the baseline a bit. Supportive friends can be 100x more effective than any pill though.
You could be describing my life honestly. I've dealt with depression since I was probably 13 or 14. I haven't figured out away to deal with it and I'm afraid until I find peace within myself about me and who I am, the depression will continue on.
I don't want it to come down to taking pills; I would like to be able to solve this by myself, but I know that's probably not possible. And unfortunately I'm at an extreme lack of supportive friends. But thanks for the advice.
I understand your wanting to solve by your own means and not through medication. Is there anyone you can talk to at least? If your friends aren't supportive, is there your parents, a counsellor or possibly a doctor you can talk to them about your depression? Also although medication may seem like a quick fix, it can in some cases be helpful in at least starting to overcome depression. It can be temporary and you do decide ultimately if you keep using it.
As much as I love my parents, I'm really only close to my dad, and he's not really someone who you can talk to about these kinds of things. And my guidance counselor is only to be talked to about timetable arrangements and other things of that nature. To be frank, I'm not really comfortable enough with anyone to talk about this kind of stuff, the exception being my best friend. And he's also going through depression. So our conversations aren't exactly inspiring or cheerful. Honestly, I would probably be long gone if it weren't for him, but I'm doing fine on my own. I feel no compulsion to discuss anyone with anything, but it really is nice to hear that other people have gone through this, and are surviving. In a previous comment, you said talking to your parents "got the ball rolling". Out of curiosity, how exactly did it help? Did it take a weight off your shoulders, or did they help you get assistance, or what?
Yeah I've been there. For a while I didn't know who I was...I avtually still don't but I've managed to stop hating myself for just: who I might be. I was raised into a Catholic family, not the die-hard-I-hate-everyone-who-is-different kind of catholics but still...Catholic non-theless so yeah I'm going through the Self-hate and the "I am an abomination phase." But I guess I've always been a bit (or just I am) liberal, and I've always believed that the God I believe in would never hate me for who I am, because who I am is happy and free, and I guess I just decided that if loving another human being was evil than I didn't want to be good. Hang in there, you can do this. You CAN be happy with who you are. (&&&)
I've struggled with depression most of my life. It is a result of Post Traumatic Stress. My depression was so bad the last few months that I stopped attending my classes and spent most days in bed. I was seriously considering suicide so I decided to ask my therapist about going on medication. The problem was that I wasn't being honest with my therapist about how bad it was. As I opened up to her I realized why I was struggling with depression and she assured me that it is treatable with therapy. I also am on medication so I can function with my day to day stuff. I think the most assuring thing to me was learning that depression is a sickness and it isn't something you have to live with. You can get better, it will take time but you can get better. In the last few weeks I have stopped cutting, been able to leave my apartment more and socialize with people more. I am finally beginning to feel normal. I would suggest going to see someone or joining a support group. Having people to talk to makes a world of difference.
My depression actually started before I even thought to question my heterosexuality, it's not that that makes me hate myself, there's absolutely millions of other contributing factors. Although I'm not entirely sure of what I am right now, I would never judge someone on what/who they like, and in turn don't judge myself on it. I'm an atheist, so me and god aren't having any problems right now, but I really liked what you said about not wanting to be good. . Thanks, you've seriously been awesome.
Yeah, sorry about the God reference, that was more for me than for you :S but anyway you're right, depression does stem from more than one factor. Mine came from questioning my sexuality, but that's not everyone. Sorry for assuming, I hope you find a way to deal with it. I'm new here but I like that the community is so helpful.
i've been dealing with it for several years and just started getting treatment for it almost 2 years ago. therapy doesn't work for me because i know myself better than the therapists and i know exactly what they want to hear and how to make it convincing. medication has been helping me though. i started off on celexa and now i'm on wellbutrin. the hardest part of my day is even making it out of my room. if i can get that far, i can go to class. i have a lot of graded attendance classes this semester so it's really been putting stress on me when i can't take a mental health day. i'm also taking an exercise class that i usually loathe but i've been getting into it more recently. exercise helps eleviate depression but not feeling like crap before/through it makes it hard to feel better afterwards. if i'm just at an emotional breaking point, i meditate. i turn off my lights, sit down on a pillow in front of a little water fountain and try to take my mind off of things.
Have you tried exercise? Exercise can be somewhat of a 'natural antidepressant' for some people. Plus it's healthy. Also, one treatment for depression that often works (though unfortunately it doesn't seem to work on me) is cognitive-behavioral therapy. Basically, identify the specific thoughts that are bringing you down, and think up counters for them. Then whenever you think that thought, tell yourself the counter thought. And keep repeating it if the bad thought keeps repeating. In terms of body image, I've also heard the suggestion to pick a little bit of your body and focus on loving and showing affection for it. Maybe you do something that makes that particular body part feel really good, and you just keep telling yourself good things about it. After a bit, switch to another body part, and keep working on it until you've done your whole body this way.
I used to do a shit ton of exercise, and it seemed to help. But lately I've just felt so unmotivated to do anything, that I can't even force myself to go outside. But I think I'll try that cognitive-behavioral therapy thing, can't really do any harm. As for the last suggestion, don't think I don't get what you're hinting at. (or I'm just a pervert. Probably that.) :icon_wink But yeah, maybe I'll try that too. Thanks for the tips, I really appreciate them.
