Self harming for the first time... how to avoid it happening again??

What actually puts you in the place to self harm? If it's a certain situation that is able to be avoided, avoid it. There's no point in continually putting yourself there.

Also I'd recommend going to see a therapist of some kind. A little awkward is worth all the benefits that this can give you. Therapists exists so people can get help I really don't understand why people don't use them as a first board of call if they're struggling! It's not as though everyone has to find out about it.

 

I agree with Sully that talking to a professional may be a good idea.
Do you write at all?
Sometimes when I feel I need to do harm to myself, writing a poem or a song or even just words in my head helps. I started drawing too.
I still hurt myself sometimes but having a creative outlet has defanitely made a difference.

 

You should definitely consider talking to someone as soon as possible. This coming from someone who self-harmed for the first time in Feb. because he wasn't in the best place and now i'm on my third time around, i've cut from just under my wrist damn near to my elbow.

So though it didn't seem too big or too bad this time, just get the help. You'll most likely thank yourself for it later on.

I wish you the best dealing with this. (*hug*)

 

I've done a lot of poking round the edges of self-harm, and I have been cutting nearly regularly since I was thirteen. I've stopped,bor slowed down at least, within these past few months, but I still have strange scars and stripes on my arms, legs, and even my stomach. Not fun. Here's the thing: if you really start, you can't stop. You should be really proud of yourself for seeking out help, even if you've only cut once. That's huge progress. Really huge. Clearly, a larger part of you doesn't want you to self harm than that part of you that wants you to. Also very good progress stuff. (I feel quite a bit like a hypocrite. Which I guess I am...)

I understand the not wanting to see a therapist thing. I saw a psychologist for a few months once, and even when I brought up the cutting thing, it seemed like she couldn't care less. Not exactly the reaction I wanted from her. However, talking to someone is a good thing, and talking to someone who cares about you is a great thing. I talk to my best friend(who also is into the whole self harm thing) about it, and when we're having a bad day, we call or text each other. Texting, I've found, is a great way to make you feel better. It's a conversation where you can think and plan out your thoughts completely, and talk to all of your favorite people at once. Provided everyone has texting of course. Being with friends balances me out, and takes away any urge I have to cut.

Another way of coping I use is singing along to music, or just even playing calming music. I put on Pink Floyd and just feel all of my tension drain out of me. You said you go running? That's a really productive way of dealing with it too. Or any form of exercise. Do crunches until you feel like your stomach may start to bleed. Do push ups until your arms start to wobble. Exhaust yourself. If you're tired, you don't have time to think about self harm. Although being able to run ten miles is incredible. I barely can manage two or three at this point

And as cliche as this is, go to bed. Things will seem better in the morning. I hate telling people this because it makes me feel like a grandma, which I'm totally not ready to feel like, but it really is true. When you're tired or stressed, everything, even minuscule things, become a huge deal. Even taking a nap, if this happens in the middle of the day, helps.

I hope I could help! If you ever need anyone to talk to, my ears are wide open.

 

I recently cut myself for the first time too. Though I used to hit myself before so self harm wasn't brand new to me. After the first time I had a very strong urge to do it every day. Even on days I wasn't feeling depressed or out of conrtol. I'd spend a large portion of my work day planning on cutting myself when I got home. This strong desire frightened me so I've been working hard to not follow through on these thoughts. It really has helped to remind myself that just because I have the thought doesn't meanI have to follow through with it. Also I've found it helpful to remind myself that cutting is not a solution to any of my problems. It is actually an ADDITIONAL problem. And I do not need any more problems right now.

And I second the suggestion of just going to bed. Usually things seem better after a good nights sleep. I am definitely more vulnerable to acting on my thoughts when I am over tired.

These steps haven't prevented me from acting on my thoughts every time but I am certain they have reduced my self harm from what could have turned into a daily thing to just an occasional thing.

 

I've been cutting on and off for almost 10 years now (wow, didn't realize it's been that long until I just wrote it). When I get the urge to cut, I keep saying to myself that it's not going to make things better, and that it'll be a lot of effort to cover it up. I also try to reach for a pen instead of a sharp object. I'll draw a line where I was going to cut and imagine that's the cut. Then when I calm down, I just wash it off. Works well with a red sharpie.

On a preventative note, like others said, it really helps to get a therapist to talk with. I also have a tough time saying what's there for me emotionally. I'm Asian and it was drilled into me not to speak up, especially about my emotions, feelings, and thoughts. But I saw a school counselor after I first cut and it was SUPER helpful. Not so much about the cutting, but all that goes on for me BEFORE and leads up to the cutting.

Hope this helps. Good luck and stay well.

 

I've been there even recently what I do is I find someone I trust tell them tlk and have a few code words so they know to tell me they love me and it gets better

 

First a shout out to 4ever Hearth your out status is epic and I comletely understand. As for dd1 you say self harm and we are all assuming cutting though I've seen many many forms of self harm. As for cutting as I assume that's what it is each time you cut its a scar a reminder of that moment every time you look at it you live it over. And it does become a habit since this is your first time its the best time to stop. Its a temporary relief not a fix. The best fix is to talk about what caused you to self harm. Getting help on that will ultimetly relieve the pain.

 

DD1, a good way of release is masturbation if exercise isn't working out for you. It is clinically proven to reduce stress and if you're already working out quite a lot (which is the other best option) then it's the next best option.
You can also try reading a book or playing video games in order to take your mind away from those kinds of thoughts. Playing video games is also a great stress reliever and recent studies have shown that if you do that consistently enough the benefits are almost on par with going to therapy. Also, if you play something like an MMO-RPG you can make online friends that can be easier to talk to than someone you see in person. Sometimes just having someone to bitch to (that you have to physically see everyday) will make you feel a lot better. =)
I used to play Diablo and Diablo 2 when I was really stressed out and it helped me a lot.
If there is a park near you house, try going there with your mp3 player, sit on a swing and just swing and sing for a couple hours. That may help too.

 

I do that too and its been 10 months i dont cut myself.

Dont you have any hobbies? Try to channalize the urge you feel to cut to something you really like.
Self harming led me to so many problems. Once i had an accident with the razor blade i was cutting and im really lucky i can still move my fingers normally.

I hope you find a way to cope with that soon.