Dangers of Anal Sex

I'm not sure on the first question, but I suspect, a priori, that the answer is no. (I don't care anway. I want to get fucked in the ass regardless of the answer). Second question, the answer is no. Third question, the answer is irrelevant, because with safer sex practices, anal sex is in fact safe.

Precautions include trusting your partner (or, if you're hooking up, always assume your partner is lying about STI status or is simply unaware of his status), using safer sex practices, which is to say, use a condom (also know in advance how use one, and watch your partner put it on correctly), and use proper lubrication.

Foreplay is a must, because you have to get used to having a foreign object up there, so he has to finger you first (during which time, he should be lubricating you). It's essential in my opinion, because 1) it feels great, 2) it makes the following penile penetration experience so much better, and 3) it drastically reduces the probability of condom failure.

People make a huge deal out of condom failure rates, and that's pretty much bullshit. Condoms work with amazingly high probability as long as they are used properly. Biggest cause of failure is using the wrong lubrication for the condom material. (The classic example that's been repeated thousands of times, but can never be repeated enough, is latex condoms with petroleum-based lubricant, such as vaseline. There are two problems here, one is that vaseline is not a lubricant, it's an oinment. Second, latex condoms require silicon- or water-based lubricant.)

The second biggest cause of failure is putting it on incorrectly. There is a little bit sticking out at the top that's supposed to grab the ejaculate. That has to be pinched before the condom is put on, so that an air bubble does not form and increase the chance of failure.

The condom has an inside and an outside. Although it's easy to know what the outside is (it's the direction the condom tip is facing when you remove it from the pouch), it's possible to screw this up too, and if you do, the condom is unsafe.

The inside of the condom must be slightly lubricated.

If the condom is expired (they have dates), it is unsafe.

If the pouch has been compromised by puncture, the condom is unsafe.

Therefore, you must check the date of the condom yourself, and watch him apply it correctly, or apply it to him yourself.

Happy hunting,

Sister Adrian

 

The average penis is smaller than the average stool. People have no issues going to the toilet every day; likewise anal sex isn't going to cause any problems provided you use lubricant.

Extreme acts like fisting can cause physical damage - a penis won't.

 

The possible consequences you list pretty much only exist in the mind of the right-wing religious wingnuts who hate gay people. If you already have some sort of anal or rectal condition or damage then I suppose anal sex could irritate it or be painful as a result of it. But as long as you're limiting yourself to a toy designed for the purpose or to a penis you should be fine otherwise.

To put a more personal take on this, I was in a 3yr relationship with a very well endowed guy who loved topping such that we were doing anal sex 3-5x per week. And I never had, nor have ever had any problems whatsoever as a result.

As far as what precautions to take, you need to always practice safe sex and wear a condom. And it would probably be a good idea to look into the resources here on EC for details on how to prepare for anal and engage in it comfortably and safely.

That all said, it is not a requirement of being a gay man that you engage in anal sex. Some guys love anal and don't feel sex is complete without it. Some only like it occasionally or under specific conditions. Some don't much care about it one way or the other but will do it if someone wants to, and some have no interest in doing it at all (and probably various other variations as well). There are lots and lots and lots of possible fun things to do sexually as an LGBT person. Anal is just one of them.

Hope this helps,

Todd