Something is horribly wrong Today at college and stuff I was fine (kinda cheery still showing signs of depression) but I managed to pull a smile and have some fun with my friends there. When I got home, after about an hour on my own I started feeling horrible for no reason, I started getting filled with self hate, contemplating suicide (I made a plan this time), ranting on here earlier (sorry to anyone I upset) and ultimately cutting my arm to the point where part of my arm is covered in blood and one of my favorite shirts is all bloody. Now I feel okay, I walked over to my boyfriends house in this state and just hugged him for like an hour, I don't know whats wrong with me, how can I go from moderately happy to suicidal self-harmer so quickly on my own. I am terrified about what I may do if these get worse. I have 1/2 a mind to get the emergency appointment at the therapist
Yes, I would suggest you go and see a therapist. You may have bipolar disorder. This seems quite serious. If you ever need someone to rant at, feel free to message me, I'm happy to lend an ear to anyone; please refrain from causing yourself any more damage by self harming. I'm here for you (*hug*)
This is a serious issue. Yes, you need to go see a therapist immediately. There are any number of things that could cause this, but it can be treated and you can get it under control. Getting to see a therapist could take some time, though. So, I advise you to go talk to your General Practice Doctor immediately, to let him know what is going on. I also think you should be honest with the people around you that you trust. This includes your boyfriend, your parents, and your close friends. You want them to know what is happening so they can keep an eye on you in case you slip back into one of these moods and they can get help for you. You don't want to do something in that state that you wouldn't normally do but could regret later. You're going to be okay, so long as you take the steps necessary to ensure your safety and well being. (*hug*)
definately go to a therapist. you might be bi-polar (like me), or have some other sort of mental illness, but either way, please go to a therapist. it can be treated really easily if you go to therapy, and if needed take medication (i know medication sounds like it sucks, but imagine living your life without any depression or "freak outs". i have been on medication since i was very young, and i can't imagine life without it.)
Go to a therapist (this is starting to sound familiar.) Though you did experience such caprice, bipolar disorder is only one possibility. I normally have very few suicidal urges, and yet when something incredibly petty happens, I will plan out my suicide for hours; for example, when my cat died. Don't worry, there is hope and I'm sure you'll lead a great fulfilling life!
