Hey there. I'll just get right into this - I'm a 17 year old who recently has been starting to realise that I might not be exactly straight. I've started noticing my attraction to other guys is as strong, or even stronger, to what it is to girls, and I've even had crushes (one seriously major, another less so that I can't really remember it that well) on a couple, although obviously nothing came of them. Even more recently I've been fantasizing about this summer being the summer I meet a guy I really like, as opposed to thinking about meeting a girl like I've been doing the past few years. Then there's the fact I'm starting to think I like guys more than girls. So yeah, I'm posting here because I'm pretty confused and this seems like a decent place to post this.
First, relax. Questioning doesn't mean you're not straight - most people do question at some point in their life, which is completely normal, seeing that sexuality is far more complex than just "gay" and "straight". That said, you aren't obligated to choose a title, not now, and honestly, not ever, unless it's something you feel fits. What matters is you accept yourself, warts and all, before finding a label that suits you, and not the other way around. Do you have any experience with relationships and sex with anyone of either sex? That would be a decent place to start. I'm seeing a lot of questioning, but not enough to go much further...
While many people will say you shouldn't have to experiment to be sure of your orientation, I don't think you should deprive yourself of the opportunity to connect with others on that level, regardless of what you might be. Relationships helped me grow, certainly, if nothing else. These attractions towards men, are they recent? Sexual and/or romantic? What about with women? Similar? I'm just trying to understand your situation, not necessarily to give you a cut and dry answer, but to see where you're coming from and what advice might work.
Fairly recently, I guess, although that major crush I mentioned was a fair few months ago. And they are both sexual and romantic, same as my feelings towards girls, just a little stronger in some cases. And yeah, that's completely fine!
i was the exact same when i was aged 17. i thought i adored women, as it turns out, this was not the same sort of adoration as i had for men, which had unfortunately been so repressed over the years i convinced myself i wasn't gay. i'm not saying you'll follow the same path as me, though it's a possibility. the best policy is to try and be as honest as possible. in time, you'll find who you really are oh and i used to identify as bi (genuinely thought i was bi), but now i think i'm just gay or more so gay.
Cheers Moskva! To be honest, that situation does sound slightly similar to mine as well. And yeah, I'm doing my best to just let it all out on here, just doesn't really come naturally to me.
