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Im not sure if im gay...

Discussion in 'Sexual Orientation' started by amazinghoax, Jul 26, 2013.

  1. amazinghoax

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    Hi
    I been lately having issues about my sexual orientation. I´d first introduce myself, Im an hispanic (If i have any grammar errors, don´t point them out) 15 year old male who´s not sure about its sexual orientation.
    My doubt comes from the fact that I think Im gay, but I always wanted to meet that girl and fall in love with her in a random place and living with her happily ever after,etc. ; but I sometimes feel like Im gay and sometimes Im dreaming in meeting the girl i will love. I ´ve never had a major crush on a girl but I sometimes think in having a relationship with a guy...
    This is really confusing for me becuase I never had such a big dilemma.
    Most of the pornography i watch is gay related, but that thougt that i meet hher is somewhat recurrent and it leaves me drooling around looking for an answer for this.:bang:
    I should also point out the fact that I think Im not sexually atracted to women but I do with men... I mean, I can tell when a girl is pretty but when somebody says "look that hot girl" I really dont see her like my friends do. I, myself, dont think that im bi but I still dont know if the girl thing is just a phase or something like that. If im gay I know that coming out to my mom wouldnt be a problem (she told me being gay wasnt bad and that she was fine if I was), but I think my friends arent mature enough to get it well.

    Thank you
    awesomehoax
     
  2. Kamina

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    You may be having some denial or even internalized homophobia perhaps from your friends(?). But I can't answer that for you. It sounds to me like you are gay simply because you crush on and are sexually attracted to guys; even if you may not see your self in a relationship with them.

    I am/was the same way. I can recognize that "that guy is hot" but I don't feel anything towards them, or very little. I like girls mostly which leads me to identify as gay/lesbian (take your pick). Also I used to have constant fantasies about falling for a guy and living as happy newlyweds (I'm not too fond of kids) but now they are nearly split evenly between fantasies of girls and guys.

    I personally think that (for me) the heteosexual fantasies are me in denial of my sexuality on some level and a reaction to the hetrosexist society I am accustomed to. Now I am able to see myself dating and being with a girl much more easily than when I first recognized my sexuality. So it could be the same for you-needing time to accept it on all levels.

    Or another possibility is that you are bi. Sexuality is fluid

    Hopefully that wasn't too convoluted and jumbled! I hope I was able to help a bit!
     
  3. Randy

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    I would repeat but Yelena said but there's just no point in me doing that as she hit the nail on the head pretty damn well!! I know for me, when my friends tell me to look at that "hot" girl, I usually look but I have no idea what is about them that makes them "hot". Or if I do, I'm like "yeah...whatever" and move on. As I re-read your story, it sounds a lot like my past. I, too, thought me having no attraction to girls would be a phase for me. Turns out it isn't a phase and I'm glad because I cannot see myself in a relationship with one.

    You said that you can see yourself in a relationship with a guy and you are sexually attracted to them, isn't that quite meaningful to you? It sounds like gay but I'm not one to decide that for you. It's up to you to come to terms with yourself.

    Aw shit, I think I basically echoed Yelena *shrugs
     
  4. unknown17050

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    You could also be just a bi-romantic homosexual, your romantic orientation can be different from your sexual orientation.
     
  5. blueberrymuffin

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    Sounds to me like you are gay, but i think your bigger concern looking ahead will be what if your friends figure this out and start asking? Cause that happened to me right around your age and became quite the problem. Then again, they could surprise you and be fine with it.
     
  6. amazinghoax

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    I doubt thats will be a problem because i am really shy and introverted. I have many friends, but i really dont talk about my feelings and people jockingly say that im a really serious person, since i dont smile often...

    ---------- Post added 27th Jul 2013 at 12:01 AM ----------

    Hi Yelena: Yes it did help me understand my situation better. I will give it thougt but now I see the situation more clearly. Thanks, have a banana! (!)
     
  7. questionable

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    Same here my friends use to say "Look at that hot chick." I just say "Yeah she is" but I can't really find something that makes that girl hot but I can find her pretty.
    I had 3 gf's already and none of those 3 is a serious relationship.... I'm attempting to have our relationship back with my 3rd ex and none of these 3 knows my sexual background either. I admire everything that girls do, I use to watch women's wrestling more compared to men's wrestling, I dunno if it turns me on I'm just impressed by their beauty and strength.

    I also had some fantasies of having a relationships with another guy but never had one.
    I also have the same thoughts you have there of falling in love with a girl who likes me a lot and having a family. But I guess every straight guy would have those kind of thoughts. Just be your self dude, that's my advice :slight_smile:

    Don't be showy (if you are that type of gay)
    If you are gay or then be it!
     
  8. amazinghoax

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    Thanks to everyone for the feedback! I am really glad about posting this here since all of you really helped out.
     
  9. Kamina

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    Glad to help thanx for the banana! Right back at ya!! (!)