So....I starting questioning my orientation five months ago. I am 36, never married, haven't been with anyone in ages. After a few months, I found a great girl and started dating her. On paper she was great. We made out a little. I don't know if I was ever really sold by her. I started having second guesses and decided that I needed to break it off. I was super confused and I didn't want her to get hurt. I feel the need to explore guys again, just to make sure. My best friends are a gay male couple. They have never had a question about heir orientation; they have always just known. When I was talking to my oldest friend of the couple about my dilemma... I felt this huge judgment from him that I was just lying and should just claim I am a lesbian. This conflict I feel is somewhat self-inflicted in his world. Honestly, I don't want to hurt anyone. I have been single and celibate for 34 years. It is only when I really started to try to explore do I feel like others think I am a lunatic and feel like I am toxic. I feel like I am without a friend in the world. I don't know what to do...:tears:
First off, you should understand that sexual orientation is really one of the most complex things that has ever graced this planet, and it only seems like it's a simple thing. That's something that the majority of the world can't seem to grasp about others, but they can easily grasp about themselves. Also, you should probably tell her that you're still questioning. It doesn't seem like you are married, so nothing's really permanent, nor would it seem it should be. Does she seem like she would be supportive of it?
