Hey everybody! How's it going? I'm new but I've been reading some of these forums for a while, so I'm so glad to be a part of such a wonderful community. So... Here's the deal. I've been questioning probably since I was six or seven, but it wasn't anything out of the ordinary. One of my parent's best friends was a lesbian, so I would ask myself things like "Hmm I wonder if I'm gay...". Not really because I had a reason to think that, just because maybe I thought it was contagious or something... Idk. Anyway, about a year and a half ago I started thinking about "what ifs". You know, "what if I way gay? How would my parents react, how would it affect my career?" But, it was only about a year ago that I started seriously questioning. So, basically for a year I've been going back and forth between gay, straight, and bi. For the last maybe 3 months I've been convinced that im gay, but somethings dont add up. At this point I'm pretty much sure I'm not straight, but other than that... So idk, I was guessing you guys could help me put a label on it. "You don't need to worry about a label!" you might say. But yes, I do. I don't what to tell everybody when I come out, and it's something that I have been struggling with for a year now, I need an answer! Anyways, here are some questions that might help you. Q: Who do you find attractive? A: Both, but girls more. Q: Who do you crush on? A: Over the course of my life more boys, but lately mostly girls. Q: Who would you date? A: Definitely girls, maybe a boy. Q: Who would you make out with? A: A girl fo sho, but probably not a boy. Maybe if he's really perfect. Q: Who would you have sex with? A: Neither, but the thought of sex with a guy really repels me. Q: Who do you see marrying? A: A girl. Okay. If you have any more questions, please ask them. Thank you all so much!! Love you!
I think your long term relationship questions are definitely the most telling. By the sounds of it, you can only see yourself dating a girl, and that's the tell I think. At the end of the day, I base my sexuality mostly on how I see myself in a relationship when I'm older, and to me, I label myself gay because I can only see myself with a girl. Yes, I can understand that a guy is attractive, but other than that, there is nothing more. From your questions, I say you generally fit the label of 'gay', but only you can decide what you label yourself as. Feel free to message me if you have any more problems. I remember what it was like to be questioning, and I wish I could have had someone to talk to who had gone through the same thing! Good luck!
Thanks, okay. I'm glad that you said that because its good to know from an outside perspective. I would agree that it would be hard to be bi if I can only really see myself in a serious relationship with a girl. Thanks!
