Hey guys, this is more of me just thinking (or writing?) out loud to myself but I thought I'd share. So today my mom went to my school to get my attendence form so I can take my driver's permit test tomorrow. I was reading it and noticed on the "sex" line, my counselor accidentally wrote an "M" first and wrote an "F" over it. And I love that. The "F" does not describe me, but having that little "M" underneath seems almost right. I haven't wanted to think (or rather avoided thinking) about my obvious gender issues. But I know "100% female" is definitely wrong. I would like to think that the "F" would mean that's what my body is physically and the "M" is how I feel/think (mostly) in my head, but the letters are combined, meaning I have both male and female (mentality) traits. Now if the "M" was bigger than the "F", representing that I can relate to the male side more, that would be pretty much perfect to describe how I feel. Oh wow I think I just figured myself out better, and all this over a stupid mistake with a pen and two letters. There is so much other stuff I could say to attempt to describe how I feel about my gender but I would just rather not right now. I didn't really ask anything, and I don't know if you guys are totally lost or not, but any kind of advice or response would be appreciated. Thanks for taking the time to read this.
If you have gender issues, don't feel pressured to fit into just 'male' and 'female', you can be bigender, agender, genderqueer, genderfluid, etc.! I'm not an expert when it comes to genders, not even close, but if my knowledge is correct it sounds a bit like you could be bigender to a degree? It sounds like you feel both male and female, yet predominantly male. However I'm pretty sure I'm interpreting it wrong.. You could be androgynous with more male tendencies. You said the letters were combined, "meaning I have both male and female (mentality) traits". That sounds like an androgynous mentality to me- displaying both male and female traits, i.e. if on a scale a man was -50 and a woman was +50, you would be 0 or close to it, if that example makes sense.(?) There are tons of possibilities. Really I can't decide anything for you. I suggest you open up your mind a little (I'm sure you have very much already!) more and consider every possibility. Seeing a therapist is also a great help. Best of luck! EDIT: Ergh, I'm messing up bigender and androgynous! Androgynous is more an overlap of male and female, so you could call it 'grey'- it might be a little darker grey or a little lighter grey but it's still grey. But bigender would be like if it was split almost in half, one half white, one half black- maybe it's 49% white and 51% black, or vice versa. I don't even know what I'm saying. Take my advice with a grain of salt, I am not certified in these things and these are just my guesses.
Thanks for the reply Two Shakes! I have done some research before, trying to figure myself out and get something to call myself that I'm comfortable with. I do like the term androgyne. I think it fits pretty well on the way I think, act, dress, ect. I can't really relate to my guy or girl friends. I feel like I'm my own weird and rare species.
