So I took a moment to register on here, because I've read some really inspirational advice on this forum a few times. Add to which, most posters on here seem lovely and genuine, so I felt it was time to post on here myself. This is a readily revisited issue from what I've seen on here; I'm someone who has identified as bisexual for years (the label was chosen more for ease of application, though I was interested in the opposite sex too), but I've always been more drawn to my own sex (ladies). For many years I accepted this simply as a preference, but nowadays I find myself agonizing all the more over the same question that's been in my mind for the last ten years - am I a lesbian? I'm dating a guy at the moment who is fairly good-looking, the kind of male build I've traditionally liked, we get on together fantastically well and we have chemistry... But I'm not sure if I feel "that way" about him. I haven't had sex with him, nor have I slept with a man in a couple of years (since an ex-bf that messed me up a little). It seems whenever I'm with a man that there's that feeling of something missing, which I don't get when I'm with a woman. I'm not sure if it's fair to be with this guy in all honesty. As I said, I like him, but there's a big 'ol chunk of me - maybe 85%-90% - that tells me to be with a woman. Should I keep dating him? The last thing I want to do is hurt him.
Hey. Just wanted to say, I can relate to your situation. I currently identify as bisexual but have never been with another man and feel I'm missing out by dating women- a feeling that's nagged me for years. So, I think the big thing is, if you realize you're not attracted to him, do you really want to string him along? No need to do anything sudden but if you find you're not as into him as you first thought, might be best to let him go and settle with someone who you are attracted to- be fair to both of you in the end.
Could you live with him like this? That chunk of you missing - would that get in the way of a full fledged relationship? If so, then perhaps you are better off dating girls
Thanks guys. I needed some unbiased views here. I guess I've been looking at this a little one-sided(ly?) From what I get from him, he really likes me so it's only fair that I'm honest with him. Thanks for the support x
I think you can only obtain and hypothesis from this website. And also, I was dating a girl for two years feeling like I was missing out and drained all the Time from overthinking. I'd think about it all day. I cared for her so damn much and yeah it was hard, but it was in a friend way n then only sometimes in a emotional way, but rarely, my eyes were always on other girls emotionally n guys physically. Honestly, it started going away that feeling once I broke up with her and I felt better in general. So step1 imo is to explore your feelings, and do what you need to do. I've also been 50-75 percent happier since taking a step it took two years to take. A completely knew positive attitude is slowly emerging and way less stress
