Why is sexuality so important?

I think it's important to human identity because I think it often effects how one sees and interacts with the world and how the world sees and interacts them.

Also I find that identity labels are of great help for finding other people that I have certain things in common with.

I hope that made sense?

 

Currently it matters because other people act like it matters.

If you walked into a crowded city shouting "I'm straight! I'm straight!" you'd get a few weird looks but would probably just be ignored. Try it shouting "I'm gay! I'm gay!" and see where it gets you.

It is part of who you are but since certain people seem to think it's wrong or strange or even just 'different' it becomes more important to you because now it's a case of acceptance. Before you told anyone you were just a random person, now you've said something there's a chance people will treat you differently even though you haven't changed at all!

If same sex relationships were considered to be as normal and accepted as straight ones coming out wouldn't even be a thing.

 

I used to be like the mainstream of people at one point that felt this way before, but in time I learned it mattered so little, so basically, the real question is; does it matter to you?

 

Have celebrities come out used to be a bigger deal when simply being gay was, to most, a hot button issue. Now that many people in the entertainment industry are openly out and mostly supportive of the community at large, there's been much more visibility granted in spheres inside and outside Hollywood, as the media often reflects and affects our changing perspectives on social problems.

There will always be people who no longer think that open closets are a shocking event, either because they're so much visibility or simply that they don't care about celebrities. But there are still people outside the media for whom this provides relevance and perhaps solace, especially those who live in communities that don't give much support to LGBT people or issues, along with people who still struggle with accepting the LGBT community and seeing LGBT rights as a priority.

For many people in the forum, coming out is an issue. Some of us find it hard, for whatever reason, to come out. The romantic relationships we build are a part of our identity and bear relevance with our friends and families. It can affect people deeply if they grow around people who can't accept that; even well-grounded relationships may falter if one says they can't accept it or even tolerate it.

There's nothing wrong with having your sexuality and your openness to it matter to you. It matters inasmuch as anyone else's does.

 

Well, regarding sexuality in general, sex is one of the most fundamental human experiences, and one of the most powerful human drives. It's only normal that people care so much about it, ad considering a major part of their identities. This is more so in our society, where some sexual leanings are considered "superior" to others by the dominant culture. Most straight people claim that their "straightness" is not an important element of their identity, not because they don't care about sexuality, but because heterosexuality is imbued in all aspects of our society and culture. We live in a straight world, unfortunately.

Their straightness is actually a very important aspect of their identity though, and this is shown by their defensiveness when non-heterosexuals gain visibility, or even acceptance within society. The fact that non-heterosexual sexualities become seen as valid forms of sexual expression make them feel like their own heterosexuality is somewhat less "justified", and that scares them (this is irrational, however humans are quite irrational if you strip away the cultural conventions that hold their world together). The whole "who cares, yawn?" thing is nothing but a defensive reaction, a desire for gays to stay in the closet so they can keep on thinking the whole world is heterosexual.

 

I agree with you. Being non-straight is still "queer" and it will always be, simply because it is a minority sexual preference. We live in a world made for straight people with straight expectations. Unlike race, it's mostly imperceptible in childhood, so it is a bit traumatizing when you realize that you are not normal... and being non-straight will always be NOT NORMAL. And we still live in world hostile to non-straights.

That doesn't mean we need to continue to stigmatize it, but instead of yawning and belittling it, maybe we should more like celebrate it. Give it a thumbs up.

On a deeper note, sexuality is important because it's a huge part of love. And love is important. Sexuality is not just about the act of sex, but also that gut-level connection with others. And love is social connection. We're social beings. Without this connection, we'll die. OK maybe not die, but life would totally, utterly suck rocks.

People need to get over that being gay is about sex, sex, sex. Get over yourselves. I'm not saying that sex is a bad thing, just that it's not the only thing. I think you can be gay without having sex. Because really, a relationship only based on physical sex is hardly a relationship at all.

 

Honestly, I think that as a whole our society is so sexually repressed - especially in the US - and THAT is what is unnatural. And I think it's exactly why we see so much of
the "yawn - why are we talking about this?" response. It is the most politically correct way for people to phrase what they're really feeling, which is probably more along the lines of "OMG! SEX?! Please don't talk about sex! It makes me uncomfortable! Can we please change the subject?! How 'bout those Mets?"

And they react this way because from the time we're young we're taught that thinking about sex is a sin, desiring sex for the pleasure it brings is a sin, thinking about 'private parts' is a sin, NO DON"T LOOK at someone else's private parts - you deviant! So any discussion of sex or sexuality is taboo and just to hear it makes them think, and as soon as they start to think they start looking over their shoulders for the sin police to come slap their wrists with a ruler and oh, god forbid if that idea sounds appealing, now they're in twice as much trouble. {{gasp}}

So now, when they're confronted with homosexuality, one of the biggest taboos in the repressed sexual continuum, they don't know how to handle it, but yet they do believe that all humans are equal, they don't want to take your sexuality away from you, but just get you to please stop talking about it!

And why do you want to talk about it? Because if you're out, you've obviously broken down all those barriers in your brain that society tries to impose and found your comfort zone with both sex and sexuality, and if you're comfortable, why wouldn't it be important to you? As humans, sex and desire are a natural part of our physiology and can (I believe) be one of the nicest bodily functions we experience. It can make you happy, relieve stress, and make you feel pretty damn good, so why not grant it importance? Why not talk about something that makes you happy?

Go for it! If enough people drive the conversation, eventually the rest will become comfortable hearing it.

---------- Post added 24th Aug 2013 at 08:55 AM ----------

:lol: :roflmao:

 

I wish we could just be with who we want regardless of their sex or gender. As long as both (or all) people involved are adults and consenting, why does it matter. Why do gay people have to 'come out'? Why is everyone so bothered about what other people do? I just want to be able to be with a woman and everyone just not give a damn. It's so frustrating

 

Yeah, I think I understand where you're coming from. I mean, like I said before, sexuality is about love, and love... who stops talking about love? Love sells in the billions.

But WE have had to repress it. We could not/cannot participate in what everyone else was talking about, selling, buying, trading, singing, dancing, eating, binging, doing, living about. Sorry, a bit over-dramatic. But YEAH, we were not LIVING.

So I think that it's OK if you need a bit more space just to breath a little.