Hello, this is my first post on here and even registering on this site has taken me a while due to fear, confusion and generally feeling terrible about myself. In brief.... I am 40 yrs old male, been married for 5+ years (straight relationship) and we recently had our 1st baby. Although these are generally happy times and I love our baby so much - I have been experiencing huge mood swings, associated with my sexual orientation. This is really churning me up inside - it is draining my energy and making me feel very bad about myself. I seek peace within. When I was a young boy i did have some 'experiences' with males and over the years have seriously doubted whether i am straight. My mental health is now suffering and I desperately need some help, advice, support, etc. It will be interesting to read any responses. Thanks.
Do you like guys more or girls? is the percentage like this? Guy: 10% Female: 90% ect if you prefer girls and you think your straight it might just be stress causing this
I think I like both - but even admitting that to myself seems difficult. I am hoping that coming on this site will help me open my mind to the truth. I have been having 'internal discussions' with myself and getting very confused. I understand that sexuality is fluid and if i fancy a guy, then that is ok.
I think this should be in the support and advice section, but I'll try to help. Ignore the fact that you have a wife, ignore everything. Just think about your attractions. How much are you attracted to men? To women? Both, not much? It's all you when you're figuring this out.
My advice is to explore and see if you are bisexual. This website showed my true self aswell I hope it helps you aswell <3
A mistake you made was not spending time figuring out your sexuality in your 35 years of life before getting married. The only thing you can do now is tell your wife, and hope she'll be understanding and allow you to explore and find out where you stand.
Since you are married and say you like both men and women plus you now have a baby. Why not love your wife loads & be happy with what you have since you are attracted to her, I don't see what the issue is unless you are wanting to get a divorce and or cheat on her which I wouldn't recommend on cheating! Seeking help for something like this randomly online considering your circumstances of a child and wife involved I would suggest the best place for you to discuss & help would be to go to a therapist who is a professional & knows how to deal with these things properly! Good luck with your situation I wish you all the very best!
Hi, Welcome to EC:smilewave Your situation is not unique and there are a lot of people here who are or have been where you are now. I would suggest checking out the LGBT Later in Life section which is focused on just this sort of thing and where you can meet a lot of people who can relate. On a more general note, being 'non-straight' doesn't mean that you are incapable of loving your child or your spouse, as I'm sure you can attest to. What it does mean is that you need to figure out a path forward that let's you be true to yourself while trying to avoid hurting those you care about or keeping that hurt to a minimum if possible (which can be much easier to say than do of course). The good news is that the folks here can help you with that, either with advice, words of encouragement, or just a great big virtual hug (&&&) when you need it. I'd also suggest checking out the other subforums here and taking part in any discussions that catch your eye. Sometimes being able to offer advice or perspective to someone else can help us with our own situation. Hope this helps and once again: Welcome to EC! Todd
Aktodd... Things are terrible because I've just come out to my wife and we have a young baby! I am on meds for depression and anxiety, right now my life seems a complete mess! I hope I have reached the bottom of the pit, it's very dark and lonely here
