Hey there everyone,just looking for a bit of help. i have had this question lingering in my head for so many years.This is actually frightening to me because so many of my close friends have been against me and i've had to let them go. And yes even though i just signed up an hour or more ago i still have chills. So ever since i was little i lived with my father so not much of a female influence was there for me.So as i grew i was more of a tom boy than anything and my dad didn't mind of course untill i was 13 and boys became more interesting that videogames,i mean i still play videogames excessively but i just had something new to be interested in. Because i also like a lot of anime and watched and read anime's and manga's with yaoi or boy's love i thought my strange thoughts and urges came from what i had been watching. but as i got older this "phase" everyone kept calling it never left me. i wanted to be a boy so badly and i still do,so i told my mom and she automatically asked me." Well what the hell would you want to be a boy for,to fuck girls? are you gay ? you dont need to change sex to be with women.". and that's the thing.. i like female's but i am not interested in them in that way but i love guys and well when i am with a guy i would prefer him to see me as a guy rather than a girl.. but its hard for me,because of where i live not many here are as accepting as i would hope. So what am i really? Am i really be gay if i am a girl liking men but i want to be a man as well. and after the age of 13 i never really saw myself as a girl anymore, I am so confused
