What do you fantasize about? I wonder if the fantasies (sexual and/or romantic) fully and completely reflect real-life sexuality. If so, I am so very confused. It seems like it is so much easier just to daydream, when you can control everything, and no one knows or thinks less of you for who you like. I also think about stuff that isn't acceptable in reality (fetish-like stuff I guess) that I feel embarrassed or weird about. Does anyone else do that? I seem to have a strange idea that by being a sexual being, I can't be anything else or something. So I feel scared to be sexual at all (and never have), like if I do, people will look at me differently, or with disgust. Does anyone else think like this?
Fantasies don't necessarily reflect real-life sexuality at all, actually, though they usually have some correlation. Most of my fantasies are fairly "vanilla," but they do have a BDSM streak to them that comes up every once in a while. I can also relate to not wanting others to see me as a sexual being. I was somewhat disgusted with myself when I was younger, but I mostly grew out of it after a few years. (I still don't want to let others in on my sexuality, but I attribute that to being gray-ace.) Getting comfortable with your sexuality, or lack thereof in some cases, is a process. Fantasies are a good place to start with it. As for what I fantasize about, it varies. Romantic fantasies tend to be men (as in two men, not a man and a woman), while sexual fantasies tend to be women only. If I insert myself into the fantasy, it's always with a woman.
