Hello! I'm Michelle! I'm 21, I live in Florida, but I'm from Venezuela. I've been looking for a place I can express myself freely because nobody close to me understands my situation. You probably get this a lot, I might just be one more chic looking for answers. So I've been with a guy, my boyfriend, for 3 and a half years now. I love him, and he loves me, we know everything about each other, we share and spend time together, everything together. I met this girl in my school a while ago, I always thought she was cute and attractive but I never expanded that thought because I mean it was something restricted for me... Recently, we went out and my friends were very pushy with me and her, like they would mess around saying that she was my girlfriend or "give her a kiss", etc... So that night we went to my friend's house and after a few drinks, we got very loose and we kissed very passionately and I liked it, a lot. After that, we started talking and texting more, she still would hook up with other people and I continued my life with my boyfriend as usual. We went out again, just me and her, it was so lovely. I've been getting to know her a lot more, and the more I know about her to more I like her... We have had a few dates, kissed and we recently had sex, my first time with a woman and it was with her. For some reason I have this freedom with her and I think I'm falling. It's been three weeks since all things started with her, I know it's fast but I can't control my feelings. She stopped hooking up with other people, she talks to me all the time, and we just daydream of being together. My boyfriend has no clue, and I love him, but I just don't know what to do. I'm scared to leave a stable relationship to something that is unknown to me, for something that I'm sure my family wouldn't accept ever, but it's something I want. I live far from my boyfriend, so I only see him on weekends, but during the week I'm close to school and to her, so on the week I'm with her. I don't know how long could this last, she tells me that she will give me as much time as possible for me to think about it, and I can tell that she loves me, and I'm afraid to say that I do too and that's why I do not want to hurt her. At the end of the day I will break someone's heart, and it's just frustrating because I'm finding myself in a position that I would have to choose. What would you do?
Probably cliche but go with the one that makes you a better person and can't imagine life with out them. Sounds difficult but you've got a lot of thinking to do. You say someone is eventually going to get hurt but you already hurt your boyfriend by cheating on him unless you two have an open relationship. Whatever you decide to do you should tell your boyfriend the truth being together for 3 years; he has a right to know. P.s. If you get offended that was not my intention. I'm not judging you, I understand we're human and we make mistake specially when it comes to love. Other than that whoever you decide to be with wether it be your boyfriend or the girl, just remember to not be ashamed of who you love. At the end of the day forget about the labels and the gender because all that matters is being happy. It's your life not anybody else's.
Okay i know this situation very well.TRUST ME.She has become like your best friend in such a short period of time and you feel extremely close to her because of all the good things you share with her. i just want to tell you that at the end of the day its who you love. i understand that you love your boyfriend a lot because you have been with him for a long time ,you love him alot and your afraid of letting that go because you dont know if you will make the right descision, and you feel 'stable' in it. Thats totally understandable,i get that. It seems this girl really loves you ALOT,and even though you and her are not officially together she has already made sacrifices in her love life to be with you because your all that she wants. She gives you time ,not for you to choose,but for you to get yourself together and see where she stands in your life because she wants to be more than your friend. Its a tough choice but it doesnt have to be. Ask yourself, where is your heart.Who has your heart.People hold on to the past and let a good thing go.Love comes in a rush and sometimes it takes time.Whoever you choose,i hope you'll be happy. ---------- Post added 2nd Nov 2013 at 06:44 AM ---------- Please let me know how it goes..i hope you'll make the right choice.
what about children? Are u fine to forsake having ur own kids to be with her? maybe u will find some way around it , like IVF? Will she want kids or object to u wanting kids? You mentioned that ur family will not accept it. Some people become intensly angry about such things. Are you prepared for that? Is she preparex for that? Romance can feel so wonderful at first...but will you still want to be with her in 3.5 years? ---------- Post added 2nd Nov 2013 at 11:41 AM ---------- what about children? Are u fine to forsake having ur own kids to be with her? maybe u will find some way around it , like IVF? Will she want kids or object to u wanting kids? You mentioned that ur family will not accept it. Some people become intensly angry about such things. Are you prepared for that? Is she preparex for that? Romance can feel so wonderful at first...but will you still want to be with her in 3.5 years?
