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What does it feel like to not be attracted to a sex or gender?

Discussion in 'Sexual Orientation' started by Joanne, Nov 8, 2013.

  1. Joanne

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    Since I'm attracted to all variations I have no way of personally knowing what its like, so I am interested in hearing some people explain what it is like.

    What is it like to not be attracted to a sex/gender?

    How do these feelings or lack of feelings manifest themselves in such a situation online where you get to know someone without knowing such physical details and then find out their sex/gender later?

    What part does it all play when such a situation arises that knowing someone's personality and inner self ends up being greater than what anatomy and hormonal balance they happen to have?

    I know this may be a hard thing to answer or explain properly but any response is welcome, I have also attempted to word this carefully if I have offended anyone I apopogize and please know it wasn't intentional.
     
    #1 Joanne, Nov 8, 2013
    Last edited: Nov 8, 2013
  2. UIOP

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    Hi. I'm a gay guy but I've felt 2 different kinds of non-attraction (is that a word?) towards people.

    First, there was a time when I considered myself straight. Looking back, I think my brain was just repressing homosexuality though. I was really 'repulsed' by men back then, the thought of being with a man romantically or sexually just made me feel uncomfortable and, although it sounds very harsh, actually quite disgusted. Then, something changed along the way and I am now attracted to guys (sorry, I don't mean to offend anyone, I am just trying to answer truthfully and bluntly).

    Secondly, I currently experience some form of attraction towards women too. I mean, I occasionally get attracted to good-looking women but the attraction feels 'false'. It feels like I'm making it up because I think that I should feel that way. It really does feel wrong and makes me uncomfortable.

    So there are my two different types of non-attraction: repulsion and then something else that I can't pin a word to.
     
  3. Joanne

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  4. Ace of Hearts

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    I tend to ask myself the same question but the other way around...
    I am asexual, meaning that I don't experience any physical attraction toward either sex/gender. I am not opposed to or grossed out by the idea of sex, I just personally would not enjoy having sex.
    What I mean is that I don't know the difference between "good-looking"/"cute"/"pretty" and "hot" for either gender. I know the connotations that someone who looks "hot" is sexy and someone who is "cute" is what people call "baby cute". Upon looking at any sort of person, I would not be able to tell you whether they were "hot" or "not" because I don't have a filter for physical attraction.
    I don't know if I answered your question, so feel free to reply or PM me if you want more info.