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Should I tell a potential room mate that I'm gay?

Discussion in 'Sexual Orientation' started by Tayb24, Nov 24, 2013.

  1. Tayb24

    Regular Member

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    Location:
    Washington (state)
    Gender:
    Female (trans*)
    Sexual Orientation:
    Lesbian
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    So I am trying to find housing as quickly as I can for the college I am transferring to in January. I'm talking to someone right now about possibly sharing an apartment off campus with them. I plan on telling them I'm transgender to make sure they don't have a problem with that, but I'd rather leave that detail out until I get all the details sorted and otherwise am offered the place.

    Should I tell her that I am gay though, just to make sure she is cool with gay people first? Or otherwise state that her attitude towards gay people greatly effects how compatible we would be as room mates? I live in Washington so I just kind of assume everyone is ok with gay people, but would this be something to talk to her about first? Because if she has a negative attitude that would pretty much mean I won't want to room with her, as she certainly be ok with me being trans then either.

    Thoughts?
     
  2. Twinkletoes81xx

    Full Member

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    I think if you feel it is important to tell her then you should. Maybe try bringing up the subject first to see what their views are. <3 :slight_smile:
     
  3. BookDragon

    Full Member

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    Location:
    Cambridge, UK
    Gender:
    Female (trans*)
    Gender Pronoun:
    She
    Sexual Orientation:
    Other
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    I think I'd want to know the other way round personally...I mean there are plenty of people I know who are completely accepting of gay people but wouldn't consider sharing a room with "a tranny" (don't you just love their use of words...).
     
  4. If you're going to rely on getting a roommate you don't know, I would say something before you're all in.

    It could put you in an extremely unpleasant, perhaps even unsafe position if your home is not an accepting space where you can be yourself.

    Good luck :slight_smile:
     
  5. Silver Sparrow

    Full Member

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    Could you try bringing it up casually? Like mentioning a LGBTQIA* character from pop culture and seeing how your roomie reacts? Good luck!
     
  6. Tayb24

    Regular Member

    Joined:
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    115
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    Location:
    Washington (state)
    Gender:
    Female (trans*)
    Sexual Orientation:
    Lesbian
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    To be clear, this is not my room mate but a potential room mate. I think being direct may be better for my particular circumstance, but thanks for the input!

    ---------- Post added 24th Nov 2013 at 03:05 PM ----------

    Leading with the "I'm Trans" card may disqualify me prematurely and plus, if I find that the apartment is not what im looking for (as I still have no details on the apartment yet), there is no point in telling her I am trans as I wouldn't be taking that apartment with her.


    So basically, I'm in very preliminary stages of discussions with this person, telling her I am trans would come after I see that everyone else would work out. I don't mind if she knows that I'm gay if I don't end up rooming with her though.